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Owners with no clue. rantish

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        05-30-2012, 03:37 PM
      #21
    Yearling
    I don't buy kill pen horses, but imy business partner used to peruse the holding pens and whenever one caught her eye, the kill pen owner asked for double what he paid at auction. I don't know why she didn't go to the auction, that's just how she did things.

    Due to some issues I have I have a hard time making friends. This girl has had my back throughout my treatment, listened to me when I needed her and been loyal to a t. Being a bad "business" friend, in my opinion and situation, can be overlooked when the rest of the friendship is all for my benefit. Also, I'm not offering more help to her, as far as horse wise, after the sale of this mare. I won't be doing any more training before she's sold. I won't be putting any more effort in than I already have, other than setting her up for shipping when she's sold.
    A few years from now with the right training and lots of miles, this mare could potentially carry around some little kid, just not without consistency like CD said.
    I guess its impossible to convey the complexity of how I feel about this and what I want out of it, which is nothing but the continued support and pleasantries of a friendship, and a hopeful future for a good horse.
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        05-30-2012, 03:42 PM
      #22
    Green Broke
    OK, well good luck and all the best. Stay safe and do what you have to do.

    Respectfully, you sound young (as in late teens?) and as such you have a long future ahead of you in this business should you continue on with it.

    Beware, the horse industry is fraught with people who would take advantage of you, friend or not. There are many wonderful, good people too. Learning to differentiate between the two can be difficult! Just keep your wits about you from the get go.

    I hope all goes well with this mare, it is very sad to hear stories like this and I do hope that you can find a good home for her where she (and her owners) will be safe and happy.

    All the best.
         
        05-30-2012, 03:58 PM
      #23
    Banned
    It doesn't sound like you have an obligation to take this horse, but maybe there is more than you are sharing here.

    I am a little confused though, you are saying that the horse is basically wild and that's how you will advertise it, but also that you put training into her and she was a good little gaming pony. Am I missing something? Why not just give the pony a reminder and then sell it for more?
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        05-30-2012, 04:39 PM
      #24
    Started
    Real friends are wonderful to have. Out of all of the people I know, I have two real friends. One girl, I haven't seen in about... oh heck, over six months. It was still warm when I saw her last, so fall of last year. I do not talk to her every day or even every week, but she I know without a doubt is my friend. It is a spectacular feeling. I too have trouble making and keeping friends.

    When we are finally professionals in our chosen fields, I will do my very best to keep our friendship out of our business relationship. I will do my best to let her do her thing, on a professional level, because I love and respect her. I will help her with anything because she is my friend. Knowing her, she is not going to use and abuse me. I would probably let her get away with more than most, but if it came down to her trying to drown herself in a vat of stupidity, 1. I am going to try to stop it; 2. If that doesn't work, I am going to let her get burned and separate myself from the situation. I don't want to drown in someone else's stupidity, no matter how much I love them.

    Oh goodness, I have watched many people I love flounder in pools of stupid. Most came out of it perfectly fine. Others just put on water wings and are still there.

    This is not your ship to go down with. It is a difficult thing to go up to someone you love and tell them, hey you know I am here for you through pretty much anything, but I cannot be involved anymore. And then give the reasons why. If they don't love you enough to stop abusing your friendship, and to be more responsible, then they do not value you the way you do them. It is TOUGH. And you have to be strong enough to do it.
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        05-30-2012, 05:21 PM
      #25
    Yearling
    I helped start the mare about a year ago. There was no consistency to it because my friend would give up when it didn't work the first time. I put three rides on her, she has a wonderful smooth trot and a very balanced canter, if she had been my horse to train, she would have been a gaming pony.
    However, since my last ride on her she has been put into a huge pasture. The fact that she was wild until she was seven, only half trained with MAJOR holes and the sudden amount of space sent her right back into being untouchable. She reverted back to being wild, since now she can escape "work".

    The reasons I'm handling this at all is that I do much value this friendship, and I do like this horse. My friend had no idea what she was doing, and didn't want to listen to what needed to be done. We've discussed it that if she had followed the training regiment, she wouldn't have to sell this horse, that its unfair that she told everybody that I was responsible before we even knew when she'd be leaving. And we've discussed that I will be handling it my way when the time comes. She's ok with it and is very broken up about failing this mare.
    I do not want this mare on my hands, but I'm willing to do what I have to to get her into a good home, and my friendship on stable terms. She wanted more training and trailer work and this and that, but I did take your guys advice and tell her I stop at getting her sold. I didn't get paid for the training I did do that was wasted, so I won't be doing any more.

    I'm in my twenties, currently renovating and running a boarding barn, and training on the side. I have been known to let my friends walk all over me for fear of losing them. Its a personality flaw that I'm not proud of, but have a very hard time changing. Usually it doesn't effect the business end of my life, but in this case it did. I'll know better next time.
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        05-30-2012, 07:52 PM
      #26
    Showing
    Real friends are hard to come by. Casual acquaintances.. dime a dozen.

    She doesn't sound like a real friend. Sure she has your back before but a real friend doesn't turn around and dump 2 horses on your doorstep without the bare minimum of at least paying you for their upkeep.

    You came on here and asked, we gave you our opinions.. the real deal. The unbiased, unedited raw cut. You don't like it, well then don't listen.

    But making excuses about the owner.. how she's a friend before a client.. that's not professional, and it's not realistic. And regardless she's going to say you helped with the horses so your name WILL be all over it. So you probably won't get that great of a rep from these horses because they are in such a state.

    That's the truth.

    So what can you do? Well since you seem to like this horse, you can rework her so she's at least over her dangerous habits and send her on as a project to someone else. Or you can sell as-is and she'll probably be put down or become a pasture puff. Either way, the outcome doesn't matter but you have control over what to do.

    Personally I would do the former, but I would want compensation from your friend. She needs to pay you in some form. So that you can use that money to turn her horses around because money doesn't grow from air and YOU are a trainer. THAT is your job, THAT is your income.
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        05-30-2012, 10:13 PM
      #27
    Started
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by AnalisaParalyzer    
    I helped start the mare about a year ago. There was no consistency to it because my friend would give up when it didn't work the first time. I put three rides on her, she has a wonderful smooth trot and a very balanced canter, if she had been my horse to train, she would have been a gaming pony.
    However, since my last ride on her she has been put into a huge pasture. The fact that she was wild until she was seven, only half trained with MAJOR holes and the sudden amount of space sent her right back into being untouchable. She reverted back to being wild, since now she can escape "work".

    The reasons I'm handling this at all is that I do much value this friendship, and I do like this horse. My friend had no idea what she was doing, and didn't want to listen to what needed to be done. We've discussed it that if she had followed the training regiment, she wouldn't have to sell this horse, that its unfair that she told everybody that I was responsible before we even knew when she'd be leaving. And we've discussed that I will be handling it my way when the time comes. She's ok with it and is very broken up about failing this mare.
    I do not want this mare on my hands, but I'm willing to do what I have to to get her into a good home, and my friendship on stable terms. She wanted more training and trailer work and this and that, but I did take your guys advice and tell her I stop at getting her sold. I didn't get paid for the training I did do that was wasted, so I won't be doing any more.

    I'm in my twenties, currently renovating and running a boarding barn, and training on the side. I have been known to let my friends walk all over me for fear of losing them. Its a personality flaw that I'm not proud of, but have a very hard time changing. Usually it doesn't effect the business end of my life, but in this case it did. I'll know better next time.
    Posted via Mobile Device
    I don't want to sound rude I'm just being blunt but if she's so "broken up about failing this mare" why didn't she take anyone's advice? She must have known on some level that this is what would result. I think what you're doing now is the right thing help her YOUR way but I'd bill her for all of it. That way she learns her lesson, that not listening to professionals will screw your horse up and cost you to fix.
         
        05-31-2012, 11:07 AM
      #28
    Yearling
    I am not reworking the horse. I am not keeping the horse. She'll be sold to the best owner I can find for her. I didn't ask for any money from the very begining of this and I'm not starting now, as she couldn't pay me anyway and that would be a whole new headache. Its been determined that if the horse sells after she moves to mass, I get the profit so there's that. And, if you didn't see, I did listen. Told her how I felt and that I wouldn't be doing any work for her other than rehoming this horse, That telling everyone they were my responsibility was wrong and I would be handling it my way from the moment they are in my care.
    Also, I'm not making excuses for anybody. She is my friend before my client, that's not an excuse. I'm not saying she did anything right here. I'm not saying I did either. I put work into something that was bound to be a flop,(for the horse and my time anyway, I have at this point, been able to keep my friend) she wanted to do everything her way. I think she realized now what the future is for a horse messed up in training, and she doesn't want her to end up put down for her mistakes, which I understand. Doesn't change the situation though.

    I didn't go into this with my business face on, I went in with my keep a good friend face on. Like I've said, I'll know better next time.
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        05-31-2012, 12:56 PM
      #29
    Weanling
    I don't really have any advice or anything, I just wanted to say that this is a crappy situation and it sucks that you have to go through it. I know what you mean about not wanting to lose friends. I hope that you can find a home for the horse.
         
        06-22-2012, 05:37 PM
      #30
    Yearling
    Update. Horse is going to auction. Owner turned every offer I had for her down. Including lady who wanted to spend 200 bucks to put her on a pasture for the rest of her life. Said it was too low, that 200 wouldn't pay for her other horse, so instead horse is going to auction to be sold for meat. I know this as fact, she'll be in a holding pen til june 28, then she'll be shipped to canada for slaughter. I tried to explain to owner that she had a responsibility to the horse, not the other way around. She failed that pretty little mustang big time. Thanks anyway guys.
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