Parents think I spend too much

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Parents think I spend too much

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    06-01-2011, 09:56 PM
Parents think I spend too much

I'm 16 and during the school year I have odd jobs. I make an average of 200$ a month (excluding the month of December, January and June), and in the summer it really depends how much I babysit and etc.

I try to save most of it for my riding lessons, but I do use some of it for other life expenses. My parents though, think I spend too much on riding lessons.

I used to ride only during the summer and spend 300-400$ on lessons, and now I am approaching the 1200$ (maybe even soon the 1500$) mark per year on lessons because I can afford it.

BUt my parents are complaining!! I understand it's a lot of money, but I never ask ANY money from my parents. Ever. On rare occasions I will ask my dad for a bit of cash so I can buy some clothes because I can't always pay for them myself. But that's it.

My parents think I ride too much, my dad wants me to ride once a month and my mom just less often in general so I can buy myself some more clothes (I am growing into a woman and I am aware I need a more complete and mature wardrobe) ... but saying I should ride once a month just makes me want to... !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I used to be struggling in school to get high 80's in the important subjects like science, math and history... I had a hard time concentrating and missing horses and thinking of them all the time didn't help. Because I rode during the entire year this year (instead of just summer), it helped my concentration a lot and am now flying by with mid- high 90's in science, math and history...

But my parents don't understand. I need to ride to get away, survive, be who I am. I want to ride more, get really good and compete a little before I am too old and busy with school, then careers and kids, but they think it's a waste of money to spend more than a 1000$ a year! But it's not to me.

What do you think.
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    06-01-2011, 10:03 PM
Most parents with opposite-minded children would happily trade your parents for you I am sure.

Unfortunately if your parents don't get it, then they probably just never will. Tell them you can ride less, but then you'll be spending that extra time with older boys.

All kidding aside, in reality it is your money and it sounds like your parents are just trying to look out for your savings account. Could you make a deal with them? Say skip one lesson per month and put that money away in your savings? Compromise to make everyone happy.
    06-01-2011, 10:47 PM
Yaa, I just talked to my mother and I compromised with her to reduce the amount of lessons I wanted to take this summer. Instead of riding twice a week this summer, I would only do so for half the summer, and the other half would be once a week. During the school year I am keeping it at 2 lessons a month because once a month is not enough for me to progress, just enough to not fall backward.

My mom still thinks that because it's a hobby, I shouldn't spend so much, but after talking with her some more she's willing to accept my decision for now. :)

There is still my dad... but like my sisters did, I lie about prices. I say 10 lessons cost 400 instead of 450. Makes a large difference to him and the world is a more peaceful place. My mother knows the truth of course.
    06-02-2011, 12:08 AM
Originally Posted by Hidalgo13    
There is still my dad... but like my sisters did, I lie about prices. I say 10 lessons cost 400 instead of 450. Makes a large difference to him and the world is a more peaceful place. My mother knows the truth of course.
Hahaha I love this. Lying usually isn't a good thing to do, but sometimes parents are better off just not knowing the whole truth. My dad was much more able to accept $30 for a show than $80, so that's how much it cost. :) I earned the money and could do what I wanted with it, but it just helped him get over the initial shock and he was able to relax and watch and have more fun if he thought it was less of a 'waste'.

In the end, it is always a good idea to put aside some cash. It'll help you save for a rainy day and if after a while you have a large amount hidden away, you can dip into the pot a little to buy yourself some new riding breeches or get your horse a few extra treats. :)
    06-02-2011, 12:34 AM
One thing you might try is seeing if you could work off some lessons at the barn (at least during the summer).

One summer I had a friend hook me up with a local breeder who had too many horses and not enough time to exercise them all (she didn't have a lesson program), so I asked her if she wouldn't mind me putting miles on some of her sweeter greenies. She countered and said she would occasionally supervise, I.e. Give me a lesson, in return.

I also have a friend who is a barn owner and has more horses than she knows what to do with, so occasionally, I'll stop by and help her feed and turn out horses and then we might ride together.

Horse people are usually willing to help other people who are genuinely interested in horses, but they HATE people who expect something for nothing. But as long as you go into the conversation projecting the attitude that you know they don't owe you any favors, the worst they can do is turn you down.
    06-02-2011, 01:46 AM
I earn my money. It's mine to do my will. My parents advise me in spending it, but I worked for it. So it's mine. I take one lesson a week at $30 a lesson. Im hopefully going to be bording soon $350 a month *ouch* Maybe prove to your parents its not a waste/ hobby.
Riding benefits:
No guys
Money management
Allows you to feel acomplished
Establishes a difference between right and left. (I'm a blond, I mix the two up alot. And if the instructor says turn right and I'm on the rail, it's obviously not direction to the rail.)
Good posture (sitting straight)
Builds muscle
Keeps you from waisting your money on extremely pointless stuff.
Teaches you time management
Keeps you out of " bad stuff"
You could persue an equine career

I'm sure you can come up with alot more benefits to better plead your case.
    06-02-2011, 02:25 AM
Thats a lot of money just to learn how to ride a horse.

Are you going to go after jockeying a Kentucky Derby?

I would try and talk to people that knows horses and been around horses like friends and see if they could teach you.
    06-02-2011, 08:10 AM
Parents... What else can I say!

First of all, kudos to you for making money for yourself at such a young age. Since you are paying for your lessons yourself I'd just sit with parents and explain them that you need those lessons as a "stress management" as they help you to relax and stay focused more (or think of whatever else reason).
    06-02-2011, 09:15 AM
Good job working for your lessons.
Nothing better than someone who is willing to work hard for what they want.
I am glad you were able to talk to your mother about it.

I am guessing your parents will never understand the riding thing. Some people just do not get it. Nothing you say or do will change that.
It is best at this point to simply figure out a plan that works for all of you.

I like the idea of you working at the barn to work off some lessons.

How about you suggest a system where you put some of your money into savings (or donate to your church or whatever your parents find important) and you are allowed to ride with the rest?

Originally Posted by HorseinJ    
Thats a lot of money just to learn how to ride a horse.

Are you going to go after jockeying a Kentucky Derby?

I would try and talk to people that knows horses and been around horses like friends and see if they could teach you.
The prices she has quoted do not seem high to me for riding lessons.
I am guessing the OP does not own a horse, so lessons are the only riding time she gets. So talking to friends and family will not help her get her horse fix.
    06-02-2011, 10:37 AM
Agreed with Alwaysbehind - very refreshing to see a younger member paying for their riding themselves. Lessons are a fantastic way of developing your skills - but I don't need to tell the OP that! Well done. :)
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