Seller's remorse? - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 10 Old 03-05-2012, 01:57 AM Thread Starter
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Location: California!
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Seller's remorse?

I've heard of buyer's remorse, everyone has. But what about seller's remorse? I'm pretty sure I've experienced it before. Only with animals.
This might end up as kind of a rant.. I want to hear what you regret selling, why you sold it, and why you are regretting it.
My story:
A few years back (maybe 4?) my family decided it was time for me to get a bigger horse.. I was currently riding a 12.2hh shetland/quater pony gelding (whom I still have AND still ride) and we were going just about as fast as we were ever going to go at gymkhana. So, my new horse was a half blind Appaloosa gelding. He was tall and lean, about 16.2hh and probably one of the prettiest appy's I had ever seen (I tend to not like them...) of course that was probably just because he was mine.. The first three months were great with him. I could do anything with him. I knew in the past he had been show in Western and English Pleasure and I also knew that the owners before me tried to make him into a horse that only ran on trails. Somthing he REFUSED to do with them.
Tater and I were in 4H, we went out on trails, I tried to learn how to ride English, heck, I even rode him in a few gymkhanas! He was great! I trusted him! Big mistake.
Right near the 3 month mark, everything changed. He developed this bucking problem. Every time I asked for him to speed up from a trot to a faster trot ot canter, he would buck. SOmetimes just a little buck, sometimes he threw me. The first buck was the worse. I had no idea it was coming. We were in formation at 4H and according to some bystanders, his back hooves went over his head because of how huge his buck was. I flew off, got stepped on(I got a cool hoofprint bruise though!) and lost a lot of confidence.
After that, I knew we were going to be seperating. I stuck it out for about a year and a half. We have multiple videos of him bucking at gymkhana for no reason. We checked saddles, had a chiropracter out, got his teeth done, changed his bit, took extra lessons. Nothing worked. After one absolutely horrifyling gymkhana with three bucks and a few rears in one event, my parents gave me their decision. Either I change disciplines completely and try and see if he would do better where he was trained, or sell him.
I loved gymkhana. I didn't want to leave it for Pleasure riding. That looked boring. I'm a teenager. I didn't want to go slow. So I made the ad.
I was upfront about everything and the lady who bought him seemed perfect, of course before I found here, I had to pick through soome losers, but all in all, she seemed right for him. He let her canter on him and he followed her right into her trailer. She gave me updates about going camping and all these fun rides she took him on. They were great. Then they hit their 3 month mark. The bucking began. At first she told me that he did his buck to start off the trail. She thought it was fun. But after a year, she told me she was selling 'due to financial reasons'. She actually sold him to buy some new breast implants.
Anyways, I now have no idea how he is, how his new owner likes him, or if she still owns him. I know he was sold to a lady about an hour away from me, but I have no way of contacting her, I mean, I have no reason to. He is her horse, if she wanted to talk to me about him, she can. But I don't see why she would.
Anyways, I wish I had taken more time, more effort to fnd the perfect home for him. I wish things were different. I wish I didn't have to sell him in the first place. It's just difficult.
Now, please tell me I'm not the only one!

Icrazyaboutu is offline  
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post #2 of 10 Old 03-05-2012, 02:55 AM
Green Broke
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Idaho
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My sellers remorse came to me more recently when I realized that the buyer probably didn't do as they were leading me to believe. I had a seven year old, well bred solid paint mare that I had since she was two years old. Had a trainer put 30 days on her and I did the rest. Fun to ride, very smart, and did almost everything I asked her to do. Sadly, I had just had my third baby (rode her through all three of my pregnancies) and had no time to work her anymore (she was being boarded 45 minutes away from where I lived). So I gave her to a breeder that was friends with my brother inlaw. He bred, raised, and showed QHs and paints. I sign her papers to him to transfer and tells me to come and see her anytime (but she was going to be in a pasture a long drive away for the winter). Sounds good right? See babies out of my wonderful mare and know she is well taken care of. The following spring (sold her in November), I stop by to visit to see how she is doing. She isn't there and I was told that she was still in the winter pasture. I think, okay, I can see her later. Come back in July to see her, she is not there again. This time I was told that she was bred and moved to one of the owner's other ranches in another state and that his brother was really enjoying riding her. I was shown the paint stud in the barn that she was bred to. I was also told that I would get pictures of her foal when it arrived the following year. So I think all is good, i just won't be able to see her. Well, time passes and the guy got into serious legal trouble (not related to horses -it was an incredibly stupid move involving over insurance on a car that he wanted someone to "steal" -which happened to be an undercover cop). I had some buyer's remorse at this point, but not much I could do about it. Well, a few weeks ago, I asked another forum member to look her up to see if she had any progeny... Not only does she not have any registered progeny, she is STILL IN MY NAME! This has been more than four years ago that I sold her. If a breeder was going to breed his APHA stud to a registered mare, they would have transferred the mare's papers! So I really worry and wonder about what has happened to my mare and if I was just getting fed lies all along >:(
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post #3 of 10 Old 03-05-2012, 04:43 AM
Join Date: Oct 2011
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Once the horse is off your property and you have cash in hand, you should probably cease to have any expectations about what becomes of them.

They are no longer your property and the new owner owes you nothing really but the money you asked for.
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post #4 of 10 Old 03-05-2012, 06:04 AM
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Greenville area / SC
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To most people, horses are more then "property". In nearly every ad you see there will be a disclaimer saying "to a good home only". In my case I always check them out first.

You never see that when selling a car. While I agree that you nave no control after you sell your horse, most people still have concern for them. I've owned horses for over 30 years and I still think about many of the horses I've sold and wonder how they are getting along. Many of them are dead now but I still wonder what kind of life they had after me.

I'm not arguing with you, I'm just explaining why I'm right.

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

It's not always what you say but what they hear.

Last edited by iridehorses; 03-05-2012 at 06:07 AM.
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post #5 of 10 Old 03-05-2012, 06:05 AM
Green Broke
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Surry, Va
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yeh it isnt "your mare" anymore.

I had a young appaloosa great sturdy horse that I just couldnt get to walk. I wasnt much of a rider and simply was into walking and going to party rides. He had way too much go. He had two speeds fast and faster. He was such a great horse but after a year of fighting I gave up and sold him to a better rider.
Well she is trying to make him into the same thing I wanted and isnt having any better luck.
So fast forward 2 years, I have my easy going walking horse, and now I am into endurance racing, sure would like to have that appy back.
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post #6 of 10 Old 03-05-2012, 07:40 AM
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Germany- but not German =D
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I say to myself, and anyone else.

If the thought EVER crosses your mind about selling your horse, then you should do it.

Of course, easier said than done, and there are always ifs and buts.

Mine is my old lad I sold in May. Was unfair to ask him to do the level of dressage he was doing without causing him future discomfort, and the fact that he was getting older, and I wanted to progress, so I sold him to a friend- who, by the way, has a better bond with him then I ever had and loves him to pieces.

Every time I watch him being ridden it chokes me because of how much I miss him, I don't think I will ever get over him.

I think you made the right choice though, sometimes you've got to put YOU first when things get tough.
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post #7 of 10 Old 03-05-2012, 11:09 AM
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: OK
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The only seller's remorse I've ever had I cured by getting the horse back. I got injured several years ago and needed to cut numbers drastically. I sold a mare that I dearly LOVED to someone in NM and heard through the grapevine last year that she was being starved.

I contacted got pics of the mare and was apalled at the shape she was in. I contacted the person who, is mentally ill but functions ok except for animals, and promised to rain Hell and ****ation on her if anything happened to that mare. She told me to come get her so I did. She SWORE the mare was being fed and was FAT. BCS 1 is not fat in anyone's book. The mare STILL isn't fat but she's getting there!

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post #8 of 10 Old 03-05-2012, 11:47 AM
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Wyoming
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I sold my mare last week. We weren't a good fit for each other. Still, she was so darn well behaved during the whole thing I had to wonder if I was making a mistake. They opened the trailer and she walked in without being led. Just amazingly well behaved. I think the people I sold her to have the confidence to make her the kind of horse I know she can be. Just disappointing that I wasn't that person.
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post #9 of 10 Old 03-05-2012, 11:58 AM
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Edmonton, Alberta
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I sold my appaloosa mare, great bloodlines, great conformation, huge scarring on her tongue. I didn't really get on with her well. I find mares and I always clash. So I had her listed for sale, very honest about what she needed, my short comings with her, her short comings. And sold her to a couple who needed a trail mount. Went out and saw their property. Had a round pen, watched them ride their current two horses, really liked them. The lady emailed me a picture telling me how great she's doing how they've had such a break through with her. How excellent she's doing. Just today I was browsing horses for sale. And there she is. For sale - untouched for a year. "we let her fall through the cracks".
I guess there's a lot of remorse there, but you never know even after making sure it's a 'good home' that it is a good home.

~Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people~
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post #10 of 10 Old 03-05-2012, 06:05 PM
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Indiana
Posts: 736
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I still have seller's remorse over a Zip's Chocolate Chip mare I sold due to marriage issues (which later became divorce). I regret it every day. I will probably never see her again. Last I heard she was in Tennessee. If I ever was given the opportunity to purchase her again I would snap her up in a heartbeat. But I won't go chasing her down, I just hope and pray she's in a good home.

Horses are like therapy ~ and almost as expensive
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