So they ride up to the house to say hi. I notice "Barney" has a little yipyip dog on the saddle with her. It was one of those skillet-face Pekineese little dogs. Never stops barking. Nobody will go to their house because of this dog. So they stop and get off their horses to visit. Barney TIES THE DOG TO THE SADDLE HORN!!! With about a 10 foot rope I might add.
Knowing that a wreck was imminent, I asked Anorexic Amber if she needed to borrow my pistol to stop her horse in case he decided to perform one of his famous high-speed evacuations. She didn't laugh. Needless to say, the lap-dog-tied-to-the-saddle-horn idea soon turned ugly. The energetic little dog ran around and around the little mare's hind legs until he ran out of rope. The mare realized she was fouled and the wreck began. She kicked up with both back feet and bounced the dog into the air. But he was wrapped good and came hard right back into her legs. This began a horrible sequence. Every time the horse kicked, the dog sprung back and hit the back of her legs. Soon the mare was kicking at the speed of about 4 beats per second. It looked like the toy I used to have as a kid that was a wooden paddle with an elastic string and rubber ball.
Attack Jack had behaved pretty well till this point. But he does like action. He pulled hard on the lead rope and the rearview mirror failed. When I realized he was loose, I knew what he was going to do next. So I did some quick thinking and figgered I could take advantage of the situation since he was going to attack anyway. If I gave him the cue at the right time, he'd understand. So right before he nailed the dog, I yelled "ATTACK"!!!