w ants advice , but not listening to the answer. - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 5 Old 05-19-2012, 09:07 PM Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: eastern canada
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Smile w ants advice , but not listening to the answer.

I know someone new into horses, and this person asks me questions and advice and/or wants to borrow things, and what they ask....they don't try it or don't ask me to show them how or do something else completely. Ive been into horses a looong time, and if i don't know the answer, ill find out. ( because face it no one knows everything! its an always learning game)
I don't mind giving the advice or what i think, or finding out stuff for them if i don't know, or showing them, or trying it out on the horse with them . But if one of thier same age friends tell them something otherwise that is way off the chart..stupid and someone could get hurt kinda stupid.....do you just leave them go? or say something? i wanna help but do they really want help? is there a way to speak with someone like that without hurting thier pride? and showing them the right way? or should i just leave it alone?

anyone have this experience?

God created Quarter Horses, then he Painted the good ones! ;)
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post #2 of 5 Old 05-19-2012, 09:11 PM
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
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Originally Posted by pastrychef View Post

anyone have this experience?
Every day on horse forums

Comes with the territory, so many opinions, ask enough people and you will find someone that agrees with you, and they become the expert on everything.

All you can do is share your experience, but unfortunately you can't MAKE them listen.
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post #3 of 5 Old 05-19-2012, 09:13 PM
Join Date: Jul 2011
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Sounds like there's an age difference between you and the other person?

Sometimes people don't know how to ask for help, or rather, asking a question IS their way of asking for help, and they don't know how to ask for help with the implementation once they have the answer. They might not have the confidence to go at it alone. They might feel weird asking someone a lot younger.

Change your approach. If you think something could be a danger, then don't approach it in the way of telling them the correct thing to do. Say you're just concerned for the person's safety and the horse's safety but in your experience,from your trainer (or some big name person), that you think Y might be better for that horse. Throw down names of 'older' people as sources - sounds stupid but that person won't think it's the idea of a youngling and may respect it more.
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post #4 of 5 Old 05-19-2012, 09:35 PM
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Missouri
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I agree, maybe your advice is coming off wrong to this person. They ask for your opinion (right??) and then they don't follow through with their advice.

There are sooo many opinions out there, that not every single one will be heard out. It's their fault if they follow poor advice since they made the decision to take it. Eventually they'll learn after a few falls on their hindend but you can't dwell on it. You did your part, you helped and the rest is up to them.

"Strength is the ability to use a muscle without tension"
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post #5 of 5 Old 05-19-2012, 10:15 PM
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Ashland, OR
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I always ask people "Before you ask me anything, do you want my honest opinion, or do you want me to give you the feel good answer?" because I'm extremely blunt. If there is something I see that is wrong I normally try and politely explain it to them....However, some people are absolutely impossible.
HagonNag likes this.

Pssh.I didn't pick up the wrong lead
It's called a counter canter...
...A very advanced maneuver.
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