What does it mean to you? - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 39 Old 07-15-2012, 02:42 PM Thread Starter
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What does it mean to you?

My best friend and I have recently had some issues and problems over our horses, during which she has said to me, you know they are horses and friends are more important to me than the horses. I've thought long and hard about this, and I guess maybe it depends on your perspective.

I was a lonely troubled child with lots of family-related issues and problems. Plus probably some undiagnosed mental problems. I wasn't popular at all, and really didn't have a lot of "friend" relationships growing up.

What I did have was a horse. She was my everything. She was my confidante, my solace, my place to run when life was unbearable. She literally saved my life, because I believe I would have ended it without her. I spent every available minute I had with her, sometimes even sneaking out to sleep with her.

Except for my Lord and Savior, I have truly desired nothing else much in this life except for my horses.

So in all honesty, I guess I have to admit that yes, my horses are more important. I know people are important too, I get that. But I will give up any friendship I have for any horse of mine or my family. They just mean that much to me.

What do they mean to you?
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post #2 of 39 Old 07-15-2012, 02:58 PM
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I would never give up my horses in echange for a freindship, and any freind, that is a true freind, wouldnt expect you to either. Thats just my .02
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post #3 of 39 Old 07-15-2012, 03:02 PM
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Agreed. I can't relate on a friend level, my friends don't mind my horses. They aren't as excited as I am about horses but never tried to be more important than the horses. I think they all know better.

However I've passed over quite a few male friends because of it. I would dump someone in a heartbeat if they stood between me and my horses.

Riding: The art of keeping a horse between you and the ground.
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post #4 of 39 Old 07-15-2012, 03:41 PM
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I am an animal lover, and have been all my life. But people are more important than animals. If they are not, then one's priorities are a bit skewed off center...
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post #5 of 39 Old 07-15-2012, 03:44 PM
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my horses will always mean more to me than friends...the only ones who outrank my horses are my family.

*Insert something witty*
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post #6 of 39 Old 07-15-2012, 03:46 PM
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Whilst I would never give up riding horses for someone else, I defo agree that people mean more than horses. I love my boy to bits, but he's not a person - I train him, am responsible for him, but at the end of the day if things went wrong either with his health or with his behaviour and my ability to ride him, I would give up on him long before a close friend or family member in the same situation, because he is an animal. Ultimately, however much we love them and how brilliant they are, they are replaceable in a way your family and close friends aren't.
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post #7 of 39 Old 07-15-2012, 03:55 PM
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Hmmm, good discussion question.

I grew up with no money, if I wanted something I usually resorted to digging in couches for quarters, or bartering extra odd ball chores for a dollar... so a horse was never in the picture until we moved out to the country and I was old enough to venture out to make my own money.

To me, my mare represents my entire childhood of learning everything I could possibly soak up about horses, about my 3 years hard work to get the knowledge I needed to own a horse... she is the embodiment of years wishing and hoping that one day I'd get a horse to call my own. When I was a young kid, I told myself if I just get myself one special horse that I truly love... then my life goal would be complete.

I still feel that way... even when things go wrong, I look out and I see Indie; a flesh and blood image of my hardwork and I am proud and amazingly happy.

My pets are my pack and herd, and I do find myself very much more compassionate towards them than I am towards my own species, but I made a point to only really make friends with people who understand that, and consider myself pretty lucky to have found a man who has a hidden like for horses, even if he won't outright admit it ;)
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post #8 of 39 Old 07-15-2012, 03:59 PM
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Originally Posted by Faceman View Post
I am an animal lover, and have been all my life. But people are more important than animals. If they are not, then one's priorities are a bit skewed off center...
Disclaimer: I'm using "you" in general terms and not directing at any specific person.

In the bigger picture, maybe. When you're considering big things like food and rent perhaps. But is the "friend" who steals your stuff or breaks your things or makes you feel bad about yourself better than the horse? What about the "loved one" who's abusive? What about a random person on the street that murders people. Are those people really more important than the horse who nickers hello and sniffles your pocket for snacks? In my eyes it's the ones who put trash over animals just because the trash is a person who is skewed.

My animals are my loved ones. I wouldn't put my loved ones over an outsider or over someone roses loved ones.

* I'm often reading and posting from mobile and Siri loves to make a mockery of the English language.
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post #9 of 39 Old 07-15-2012, 04:05 PM
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Horses have always been my life, anyone who is my friend has learned to except it Even my other horsey friends sometimes don't fully understand my commitment to horses. They get arsy with me when I say I have to do the horse before we do something, or when I get up at 7am after only 3 hours of sleep after a night out and i disturb them

For me people cause problems, horses solve them.

Horses have been my therapy when I was going through crap at school and all my 'friends' were fighting between themselves and leaving me hanging between a rock and a hard place. They were there when my best mate almost died, twice, in 24 hours. They were there when I lost any sense of ambition and hope and I was just surviving. Horses will always be there, always. People aren't.

If anyone gets between me and my horse, my horse wins. Unless the person is in mortal danger... then perhaps the horse might get her dinner late XP
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We lose ourselves in the things we love, we find ourselves there too ~Kristen Martz

Last edited by OwnedByAlli; 07-15-2012 at 04:10 PM.
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post #10 of 39 Old 07-15-2012, 04:07 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by Faceman View Post
I am an animal lover, and have been all my life. But people are more important than animals. If they are not, then one's priorities are a bit skewed off center...
Sure, people are more important in the big scheme of things. I wouldn't save my horse's life over my friend's life, no matter how bad it hurt. But I also wouldn't put my horse in discomfort or danger just to accommodate a friend, does that make sense? I wouldn't give up my horse because of something a friend wanted me to do or be either.

Actually, when I divorced John, it really came about because of the horses. He decided we were done with that phase of our life and the horses needed to go. He never understood it was not a "phase" of my life, it was my life!
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