Join Date: May 2009
Location: Mid Northern TN
That sounds like a rough situation all around. How old are you? If you are a parent yourself, it sounds like you're plenty old enough to be running your own life rather than having your family run roughshod over you.
You may need to take a hard look at yourself, your life, and your finances. Can you afford to take care of this horse on your own? If so, it sounds like you need to move her somewhere else, where you can take care of her and ride her as you see fit. If it was me, I'd pay my mom off the money she thinks I owe her over time as I could afford to, just so she couldn't hold that over me any more.
If your mare is a healthy horse, at 16+ she should have no problems carrying your weight. If you cannot afford to take care of this horse, then selling her may well be your best option. I expect that no matter what you decide to do, it will be very dramatic and with much complaint from your family's side. Oh well. You'll have to learn to do what you know needs doing or continue on with the status quo...