What would you do?? *warning long post* - Page 3
 
 

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What would you do?? *warning long post*

This is a discussion on What would you do?? *warning long post* within the Horse Talk forums, part of the Keeping and Caring for Horses category
  • WON'T TRANSPORT HORSE UNTIL PAID FOR
  • Horse forum move horse my house

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    10-02-2012, 10:09 AM
  #21
Yearling
I'm a bit confused... and forgive me if I'm missing something. But you're a grown woman, obviously independent. The horse is yours, you own him and pay for him. Why do you need your mother's permission to do anything with him? If you want to sell him, you should just be able to do so. If she's going to try and exhibit that kind of control, can you consider moving to a different barn? I think this may be the reason some people thought you were so young. Asking permission is expected if you're under 18, but after that if he's genuinely your horse she shouldn't be able to forbid you from selling him If you wanted to. Yes he is on her property, but that shouldn't give her rights to dictate whether or not to sell him, even if you owe 300 dollars. That's like blackmail, telling you she won't let you do anything with him until you pay her.
     
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    10-02-2012, 10:56 AM
  #22
Started
Something just doesn't ring true here. This lady says she doesn't work, but just to live and pay rent or a mortgage, plus food, transport, clothing etc., somebody is footing the bill. Maybe she actually also lives with her mother.

She says her mother will not allow her to sell the horse, until she pays the money owed. Why not sell this horse, who apparently jumps 6' and should fetch much more than the money owed? This way, mother could be paid from the proceeds and our OP would have quite a lot of money left over.

I absolutely understand the OP not wanting to part with her horse. It is always difficult to sell a beloved animal, but in this case, if in fact everything we've been told is true, it might be the only way out. If sold, at some point in the future, she might even be able to purchase the horse back.

If in fact the OP does have some kind of an income, then she could possibly find a new yard, pay the month in advance or whatever is required and move the horse when her mother and sister are not around. Not the best idea in the circumstances, but it is her horse and at 27 years old, she should be able to take charge of the situation and do something.

Lizzie
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    10-02-2012, 11:09 AM
  #23
Weanling
Im just going to quietly subscribe to this...
     
    10-02-2012, 12:28 PM
  #24
Banned
Quote:
Originally Posted by FeatheredFeet    
Something just doesn't ring true here. This lady says she doesn't work, but just to live and pay rent or a mortgage, plus food, transport, clothing etc., somebody is footing the bill.
I believe that she is on Income Support (or whatever it's currently called, as I have not lived in the UK for over a decade).

Quote:
Originally Posted by angelghost    
To be fair it was not nice to see things that personaly I took to suggesting that cause of the type of income I am on I should not have a horse
If that is the case Angelghost, I believe that it is morally corrupt to have a horse. And you do need to relinquish control to your Mum or sell her.

You also sound jealous that your 18 year old sister is not paying for anything, while you have to. However you said that you are 27 (I think). There's quite a big difference in expected responsibilities between 18-27.
     
    10-02-2012, 01:08 PM
  #25
Foal
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shoebox    
I'm a bit confused... and forgive me if I'm missing something. But you're a grown woman, obviously independent. The horse is yours, you own him and pay for him. Why do you need your mother's permission to do anything with him? If you want to sell him, you should just be able to do so. If she's going to try and exhibit that kind of control, can you consider moving to a different barn? I think this may be the reason some people thought you were so young. Asking permission is expected if you're under 18, but after that if he's genuinely your horse she shouldn't be able to forbid you from selling him If you wanted to. Yes he is on her property, but that shouldn't give her rights to dictate whether or not to sell him, even if you owe 300 dollars. That's like blackmail, telling you she won't let you do anything with him until you pay her.

That was my point excatly... I can only ride my horse ect when she allows me to and I don't have ket to the yard gate or take room so I can't do anything when they are not there at all apart from go to my horse in the field. Can't bring her in or anything and just groom ect cause I can't get to my stuff in the tack room enless they are there. Even though I get asked to go cheak on the horses when they can't go up there ect. The 300 I owe is for extra girths ect they brought her with out my aklodgement ect. Since I got my horse in june I've maybe rode her about 8 times either cause I havent had access to the take room or because I've been told im not aloud to ride her cause of my weight.

Thank you for your reply :)
     
    10-02-2012, 01:18 PM
  #26
Started
I would work my butt off and move. You're 27. Your mother should not be telling you what to do. You are more than capable of making decisions on your own.
     
    10-02-2012, 01:33 PM
  #27
Green Broke
Find a day when they are there, take YOUR TACK not the extra they bought for your horse, ad get your horse and MOVE.

Simple solution. If your mom is trying to squeeze money out of you for something you don't owe, just remove yourself from the equation.

Its not unheard of for parents to support an 18 yr old. My parents helped my sister out for 4 more years while she was in college, helping with rent and what not because she was a full time student...didnt have time for a job.

Now maybe that's not the case with your sister...but honestly how much can you really expect an 18 yr old to make?

My parents are still paying for my horses and im 20...but im in Hawaii and can't have them here...so I send them money when I can.

By 27 you should hopefully have a ground base of money that you can use to move your horse to a different barn.

Theres no reason to stay at your moms place.
     
    10-02-2012, 02:36 PM
  #28
Foal
Quote:
Originally Posted by FeatheredFeet    
Something just doesn't ring true here. This lady says she doesn't work, but just to live and pay rent or a mortgage, plus food, transport, clothing etc., somebody is footing the bill. Maybe she actually also lives with her mother.

She says her mother will not allow her to sell the horse, until she pays the money owed. Why not sell this horse, who apparently jumps 6' and should fetch much more than the money owed? This way, mother could be paid from the proceeds and our OP would have quite a lot of money left over.

I absolutely understand the OP not wanting to part with her horse. It is always difficult to sell a beloved animal, but in this case, if in fact everything we've been told is true, it might be the only way out. If sold, at some point in the future, she might even be able to purchase the horse back.

If in fact the OP does have some kind of an income, then she could possibly find a new yard, pay the month in advance or whatever is required and move the horse when her mother and sister are not around. Not the best idea in the circumstances, but it is her horse and at 27 years old, she should be able to take charge of the situation and do something.

Lizzie
Again I moved out of home when I was 16, I rent and don't own my property. Also Yes my horse would make a fair price if I sell her that's not a issue, the issue is my mum wont allow me to sell her till I give her 300 first. I couldnt move her when they not around as I don't have a key to the yard gate.

But thank you for your input :)
     
    10-02-2012, 02:45 PM
  #29
Foal
Quote:
Originally Posted by AlexS    
I believe that she is on Income Support (or whatever it's currently called, as I have not lived in the UK for over a decade).



If that is the case Angelghost, I believe that it is morally corrupt to have a horse. And you do need to relinquish control to your Mum or sell her.

You also sound jealous that your 18 year old sister is not paying for anything, while you have to. However you said that you are 27 (I think). There's quite a big difference in expected responsibilities between 18-27.

Firstly, I pay for her. Yes I do recive benifits but I also do home partys for company to earn a bit of extra income. Im saying if I didnt think I could afford a horse in the first place then I wouldnt of got one or even thought about it but I done the working out financially and I could do it, with or with out the help of my partner at the time, Hence why I went ahead and got the horse..

No not jelous of my sister at all, but at the same time she's 18 (classed as a adult) so surely she should pay some of her way at least. We are both my mums daughters yet its one rule for one and not the other that's all Im saying. Not jelous of her at all, Just stating a fact cause If it was someone elses yard they wouldnt be like ''oh your 18 you don't have to pay a penny to have a horse here ect, but cause your 27 you do'' Its kinda like were both keeping our horses there surly there should be the same rule to apply to us both? If you get what I mean :/

Maybe Im not coming across clear enough...
     
    10-02-2012, 02:46 PM
  #30
Green Broke
Move her when they ARE there.

Go at this like you would at any other barn. Don't let your mom railroad you just because she is your mother. This is a business agreement/issue and yall need to go about this that way instead of mother daughter having a slug fest kind of deal.

Give your notice, pay for what you owe, find a barn to move your horse and on they day you want to moke make sure she's going to be there.



I don't see how SHE wont let you sell your own horse...do you have the papers for this horse? Is your name listed as the owner? If so then that is YOUR horse to deal with and YOUR horse to sell. Not her.

Scrounge up the money somehow if you need to to pay her back and then burn rubber outta dodge.
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