Thanks for the replies. I just wish I could figure out what I'm doing wrong. Watching the video it looks like we're hacking, badly.
If we're at a halt, I lightly tug the reins with my ring fingers and she'll bend at the poll. But at the walk, trot or canter, nothing that I do will get her to get on the bit. I'm doing something wrong, I just don't know what. I can't wait to find a trainer that isn't going to just keep telling me to get a stronger bit and turn her into a cow horse. I know it's not her. I mean I know she's rust and unfit, but I'm worse.
Sorry. I'm having a big pity party here.