5 year old horse needs respect for me! - Page 4 - The Horse Forum
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post #31 of 49 Old 12-14-2012, 08:25 PM
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nicfish, a horse senses what is going inside of you and he will chose that over body language. If you tell yoursef "I'm the boss today" do you mumble it under your breath or straighten up, head held high and say "I'm the boss today". Repeat it until you feel it in your body. Now you will feel the confidence. Keep telling yourself that as you go to his stall. You might even see a positive change in his demeanor. No lovies, no kisses. The boss doesn't do that. Let's start with that and see how it goes.
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post #32 of 49 Old 12-15-2012, 05:57 AM
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I've been meaning to reply to this thread but haven't had time there is a lot of good advice, so I won't go into that you need to correct it or how. What I would like to focus on is why.

Horses aren't aggressive or act that way by nature. Two reasons a horse acts aggressive. Instinct or learned behavior. Yes a stallion will be aggressive to protect his herd and a mare will be to protect a foal. But that's not the situation. Their instinct is flight or fight. If their escape is taken away, like a round pen or even a stall, fight will kick in. Learned behavior happens over time. It could be that the first time they test a human with the bad behavior, it worked and they get left alone. If it keeps working, they will continue to do it.

You say that he's already had 7 or 8 owners. Why do you think he went thru so many? When you get a new horse, most people are all excited and coo over the horse. Once the newness wears off, they don't act that way any more and give less attention to the horse. When a horse is moved, or sold, they will act laid back and kind of timid. After a while and they get used to things, they will test the waters. This could easily be what is happening to your horse. He gets sold and after a couple of weeks he tests the waters, acts aggressive. He then gets left alone and sold because he's "aggressive". Each time he is sold, he gets timid again but tests the waters after a couple weeks. The cycle keeps repeating and he learns that if he acts aggressive, he'll get left alone.

Also, with so many different owners, he hasn't been able to connect with a human or learn to trust. We had the same problem with one of ours. We were he sixth owner and he was only 6. It took a couple years before he started to come around to trusting us.

Hopefully that helps you understand why he could be acting that way.
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post #33 of 49 Old 12-15-2012, 03:29 PM Thread Starter
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I fully understand and agree with you usandpets. The reason he got sold so many times was because the owner after owner just didn't have time for him. Poor boy.

All horses deserve, at least once in their lives, to be loved by a little girl <3
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post #34 of 49 Old 12-15-2012, 03:59 PM
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What usandpets is saying is not that people did not have the time for this horse, but that they were scared and overwhelmed by this horse. I would urge you, OP, to stop seeing this animal as the "poor boy."

His aggression is VERY dangerous and, as several folks have wisely suggested, you need to be tough with him. Sympathy will not help him. Grooming and bonding will not help him. He does not understand where he is in the pecking order if horse and human. Some time in the near future, he will hurt someone badly and be on his way to a dog food can.

Every little show if aggression, balking, and refusing continues to add up. You need to think hard about your ability to handle this. He needs discipline and structure and clear boundaries or he is gonna be doomed.
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post #35 of 49 Old 12-15-2012, 04:39 PM
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Originally Posted by tiffanyodonnell View Post
What usandpets is saying is not that people did not have the time for this horse, but that they were scared and overwhelmed by this horse. I would urge you, OP, to stop seeing this animal as the "poor boy."
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Exactly. If you treat a horse as a rescue horse, they will stay a rescue horse. If you treat them like any normal horse with boundaries and guidelines, they will be a normal horse. Don't treat him like a "poor boy" or love on him. Once you get his respect, then you can start loving on him within limits. You'll still need to keep the boundaries and guidelines or he'll go back to the way he was.
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post #36 of 49 Old 12-15-2012, 06:19 PM
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every night in the dark i walk out in my big coral with a bucket full of grain. five head of horses that love there grain. all are fisty and frisky and not one of them invades my space. and thats about four feet. not one bumps me.pushes me.or touches me even if they get to fighting amoungst themselfs cause they really do love there grain. they all give me the proper amount of room that even in the dark they never invade my space. also for this i never lead one of my horses or a horse im training for a client up next to me.i like them three steps behind me. not that they can t learn..just easier and faster for them to learn my space doing it that way. just stay in control and know that there big animals. not mean. they dont think that way till they lose there respect for people..and then one of there love taps.. can really lay a person up. and if it happens to be a kid. its very very bad. this is not going to take very long if you figure it out and take control of your horse. but its not going to be easy. im not sure what your trainer is telling you or how your trainer is handling your horse. but your trainer should be able to get your horses respect enough that alittle of it will come to you fromyour horse to give you a head start on taking control of him. you should try to do it by yourself right now. its one of those times that you have to win once it starts. losing is not a option.if you lose then its so much harder for you to actually take control of him. good luck. great thread everyone. keep us posted on how its going.. ride safe everyone..happy holidays
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post #37 of 49 Old 12-15-2012, 09:13 PM
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I do the same. I feed 8 in one pasture. There are times they will test the boundaries of my space. I bring a stick with and they learn real quick, if they are within reach of that stick, they will get whacked. The problem is when you aren't consistent with them.
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post #38 of 49 Old 12-15-2012, 09:28 PM
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This horse is not living in the past, OP, he is living in the present - by keeping your mind on his past you are handicapping him and doing you both a disservice. Stop looking for a reason/excuse for bad behavior and start demanding good behavior.
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post #39 of 49 Old 12-15-2012, 10:00 PM
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I agree with the other posts. Love and the 'hugs and kisses' come after the respect has been earned. You have to become that lead horse of the herd, whether it is a herd of two or a herd of twenty. When a horse knows you are alpha in the herd they will respect you. I had an alpha mare in a pasture with ten other mares....they knew she was alpha...she knew I was alpha to her. I could take her extra hay out into the pasture with the others and they wouldn't try to approach her in any way...they also wouldn't approach me in any way on my way in with the hay. But it didn't start that way, it had to be shown that I was alpha, like my horse showed them she was alpha. Once this is established, then you can offer the love on your terms. This is where your body language also changes and your demeanor. You use whatever it takes to keep your horse out of your space at a safe range. If your horse kicks out, use a longer whip, or a stick, just something longer than a crop. You will be too close in range of getting hurt. I used to drape a lead line over my shoulders, the ones with leather popper on the ends are even better, and had it ready to swing immediately if I needed to. I set up the horse for success, by being prepared mentally and physically for the situation I was about to walk into. Be wise and safe, don't be a hero, ask for help if you need to.
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post #40 of 49 Old 12-15-2012, 10:03 PM
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OP, I totally get where you're coming from with the "poor boy" stuff. I bought a young horse a couple years ago that came from a crappy place. She was thin, full of parasites, and quite timid. At the same time, my father and I bought two other young horses that came from a much better home.

Now, I am not one to dote on my horses, and I continually told myself not to feel sorry for her. But I did treat her differently (without even realizing it), and she did develop some bad habits (wasn't aggressive, don't really feel the need to go into details, though). When I took her to a colt-starting clinic, the clinician pointed out she was a little spoiled right away. Since then, I have raised my expectations, and she has met them.

I guess my point is pity does nothing positive for these horses. I know how easy it is to fall into that state of mind without even realizing it.

Good luck.
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