Am I ruining my horse?

Must he do showmanship? If he is good at everything else and is only required to do showmanship as a pre-req for districts or states...he doesn't need to place...just show up. Also, look to see if anyone can show you how to 'ball' the chain. It looks terrible but most 4-H clubs allow it in showmanship.

I agree, find a new trainer! Good for you for having the guts to do this! I'd rather take it slow with him and allow him and your daughter to bond and trust eachother and cuddle than to rush things and make him fearful. Patience and trust is what horsemanship is all about.

Very good for you to yank him out of there. That's not an easy thing to do! Find a trainer who is patient and treats your horse as an individual and works within everyone's comfort level :)

It seems like you need to just teach him to respect your daughter's personal space. I will give you the link to a good article below. Ditch the trainer, seriously. I would be pissed if someone did that to my baby, even though he doesn't have the same type of personality as your horse.
I really feel sorry for your daughter now. If she's anything like me, I bet she's very hurt by not having her buddy. I think you should ask for your money back and dismiss the trainer. If you need a new trainer, be sure to put them through some questioning about their methods. If possible, see if you can accompany them when they're going to train someone else's horse.
You're probably now going to have to go through weeks of more trust gaining all over again because of some moron trainer (not your fault, you didn't know). Different types of horse need different approaches to training & discipline. Just like humans.

Good luck!!! I hope you can get him back to normal so you can start really training him.
- Brie

http://www.equusite.com/articles/gro...dRespect.shtml

Any "trainer" that is that rough with a horse and a chain, I wouldn't consider a trainer in the first place . . . . As for the buck when asked to canter, I have seen that a couple times and it seems likely that is could be something chiropractic, I would have it checked, I know a few people that this was the cause of that . .

Thank you everyone! Your advice and encouragement has been invaluable!

Hi there. I just wanted to say, this horse sounds like the kind of horse who has been feeling quite 'alone' and in bonding with your daughter has formed that special type of friendship that you sometimes get just once during your lifetime with a horse. They have built that friendship up in their own unique way of communication and it is on that the trust was built, and the horse has learned to respond to her.

The trainer you brought in seems like an aggressive 3rd party who does not understand that there is a difference in horse personality types. No one horse is exactly like another and there are these rare horses that are extremely effectionate, if not dependant on their owner. By handling him like they did (the trainer) they have wedged themselves inbetween the bond formed between your horse and daughter.

I think its very good to have a trainer/instructor, of course! But -if- that trainer starts to come inbetween the rider and the horse to such a degree that there is a distinct shy in the horses behavior from how he was before -fear- turning away from one he trusted, ect, its bad not only for the horse, but the rider, since it means the trainer is not recognizing the situation for one that has become bad.

I agree with the trainer actually that "he has to learn that the arena is business and cuddling is for the pasture". But usinga chain to teach it? That doesn't sound like a good idea at all. If he's submissive and trust your daughter he shouldn't have problems to learn it without chain and jerking him around. I'd find another trainer, who'd work with both - horse and a girl - and show her how to teach him to respect the personal space. And I'd do it before he becomes very head shy or afraid of human.

BTW, I'm not against cuddling. My paint is all around me looking for attention (NOT treats) when I'm out there, and even my "don't care" qh looks for attention when I'm around. But when they are in arena they know that it's a business and that I don't care for the kisses until we are done with riding and they are unbridled.

Outstanding!
What a great resolution to this thread and to your dilemma.
Glad you went with your gut and took your good horse home.

I would definitely find a better trainer; there is a time and a place for a chain, and a horse certainly shouldn't 'fear' it...it is a tool, not a weapon.

While I don't agree with this particular trainer's methods, I DO agree with her on the point of not cuddling and invading your space unless you asked the horse to...they are not dogs, and they can step on and hit you in the head, and hurt you much more than any canine could doing the same behavior. I do love on my horses, but I don't allow pushy cuddles...I invite the horse into my space, the horse does not come pushing into mine, especially when it is working time.

I agree Mom2Pride. There is a place for a chain, but it sounds like the trainer went to the extreme.
I like lovey horses, but they have to respect your personal space.