Being on period=Loosing it with my horse!! - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 21 Old 08-14-2012, 12:09 PM Thread Starter
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Being on period=Loosing it with my horse!!

Yay for a post that will make me look really bad!! (oh well, gotta let it out)

I can be extremely irritable when on my period (no details necessary) and it seems that every ride during this devil's time ends up horrible.

For example, the day before yesterday all Hejduk did was spook at a tarp and I fell off but I lost my temper with him as if it was a buck or something. Then I was in a bad mood for the rest of the day as my confidence level dropped in the same way a bucking would drop it.

Yesterday I had a crop and was trying to make him do circles on his right lead (not fun for either of us..he favors left) and after probably ten circles it still wasn't good enough for me so I kept going and he suddenly hopped left and out of the circle with my angry a** on the ground. (This was bareback)
Well, I reminded myself of why I don't normally ride with a crop! I hit him with it repeatedly. No sugar coating-that's what I did. :( I hate myself for it because I know it does no good. But, by this time I had the stupid: "well I will teach you a lesson and force you!" attitude. I lunged too and then got back on to try the right circle again and that time was unsurprisingly worse. He kept changing leads and being unbalanced and trotting. I calmed myself down a bit and walked around.
But then my dumb a** just had to ask for a stupid side pass; something he can do but never when he's irritated... he did one direction and I immediately demanded the other only to be greeted with some rearing-and I used the crop :(- until a large rear that sent me sliding down his butt. I was irate. I lunged him again.

So, judging the fact that I hardly ever hit the ground but did so three times in two days (two of which being my fault!!), I THINK I SHOULD JUST LAY OF THE SADDLE DURING MY PERIOD!!!!!!! Maybe use my anger out on the poop rake and get things done!! ;)

Am I the only crazy female who ends up beating her horse when on her period?? I swear any other time of the month I have a brain and work out the issue calmly. Is it just best to lay off the saddle during this time?

I'm sorry Hejduk :(
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post #2 of 21 Old 08-14-2012, 12:15 PM
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It sounds like you need to take that time to yourself, and give your horse the week off. It sounds like only detrimental things happen. Clean and polish your tack, go for a run, do other things.
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post #3 of 21 Old 08-14-2012, 12:18 PM
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If your periods cause such mood changes that you hit your horse, it may be a good idea to go to a doctor. There are medications that can help.

If a doctor is not an option, I would avoid riding during that time. Your horse didn't deserve to get hit repeatedly. (But you know that already)
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post #4 of 21 Old 08-14-2012, 12:18 PM
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I was the same, but I've been diagnosed with PMDD (premenstrual dysphoric disorder). If you are feeling emotionally terrible on your periods, you should see a doctor about it. I've since been put on Depo-provera in hopes of alleviating my PMS symptoms, and so far I've felt great.

But I was the same way, and had to learn the hard way not to get into a "battle" when I'm on my period. No tarps, no bad leads, no bareback, no crops, no sidepass, lol. Period week is endurance/muscle building week. All I do is long trot for 5-10 minutes each side and build muscle. Can't go too much wrong there, lol. And it keeps the horse in much needed shape.
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post #5 of 21 Old 08-14-2012, 12:24 PM Thread Starter
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Yep! You're all correct haha. I will do other things in this time!! I don't think I'm going to go seek meds at this point because I can prevent it by either doing other things or following 'oh vair oh's advice
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post #6 of 21 Old 08-14-2012, 12:25 PM
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I definitely think that if you get like this, and you know you do then you should not take the chances of riding and getting mad at your horse. I would pick other things to do during this time and maybe like other people said, see a doctor about it. If it got bad enough you and/or the horse could end up getting hurt too and I dont think thats a chance you should be willing to take.

"It is not enough to know how to ride, you must also know how to fall."
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post #7 of 21 Old 08-14-2012, 12:30 PM
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I have to be honest, no I have not heard of other women being this irritable towards their horses while on their period. It probably happens to some degree but I haven't seen it and don't experience it myself. Although I think realizing that your period has this effect on you is admirable and you have the power to make things work better for your horse and yourself.

Sounds like you need to consciously avoid riding while you're feeling angry, wether its due to your period or not. Falling off not only puts you at risk but these behaviors may soon harm your horse. If the crop is such a temptation, toss it out, and save your horse the frustration.

Horses do so much of their communicating with us through our emotions, as they obviously don't speak our verbal language. If all we are offering our horse is frustration and rash violent reactions, that is all they can really give us back. Think of it as having an argument over the phone. If the person on the other end is yelling at you and not hearing your side of the matter how hard you try they just yell at you. What does your reaction tend to be? Most of us would yell back for a little bit trying to prove we would like to work the problem out, eventually though we hang up. Horses can be the same way, if we are only offering them frustration that's what we'll get in return. Luckily, it works both ways :) if we offer clear relaxed cues and are only firm when our horse is feeling lost and needing some extra direction the ride/groundwork/interaction with go much smoother.
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post #8 of 21 Old 08-14-2012, 01:11 PM
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I am going to be bold here, as a woman who can find myself in the same situation as yourself. This is a time to humble down and lose the prideful attitude. I am not saying you are doing it on purpose, but the fact still is that you act this way every time (from what I gathered). If you know you are acting this way or are going to act this way, it is your responsibility to be humble and quiet. It is a very intense struggle that you may not always win, but having the mindset of "I am acting like a fool so I am going to just hush up now" is a great place to start. You may even find that you apply this to other aspects of your life.

Do not seek medication - that is a crutch (and many will tell me I am wrong). Take responsibility for your feelings and actions, and stop ill-tempered thoughts and feelings before they manifest themselves physically by becoming quiet (inwardly and outwardly) and humble.

There is no greater teacher than humility.

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post #9 of 21 Old 08-14-2012, 01:22 PM
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Stay away from the horse when this is going on. I suspect you are exhibiting other less than pleasant behaviors around people as well as around the horse.

See a human doctor and get it sorted out. Life is way too short and your life is way too valuable to be spending a portion of every month unhappy like this. At some point you may react to your horse out of temper rather than good judgment and the horse may really hurt you in an evasive move.
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post #10 of 21 Old 08-14-2012, 01:27 PM
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Robert Dover said, "If you got hit (with a crop) if you went someplace, would you WANT to go there?"
I'm a hothead, but I've gotten more out of my horses with "good job" than with a crop. Yes, when I have to retrieve feeding buckets, and I'm in my flippy-floppies, I DO carry a crop 'cause I like my toes un-bruised. Still, I knew my horses were listening well many years ago, when I saw my students flipping the crop up to use it and my horses would respond beFORE they used it. It's that peripheral vision that they have, ya know.
OH, one more thing, a story. I was keeping my 8yo OTTB in a stall when I first got him. He didn't listen to me, so I yelled at him. He was facing towards me, stall door open. He wheeled around and kicked the other part of the stall SO FAST, that I didn't realize what had happened until my heart stopped racing. I also realized that it could have been my HEAD instead of the stall. Food for thought. You CAN control your moods. If you were asked to do so with a gun to your head, I am SURE that you would. Don't depend upon any meds. Your body will fight them and they won't work after awhile.

Last edited by Corporal; 08-14-2012 at 01:31 PM.
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