Originally Posted by Falcon
Mm don't have money for a professional haha I'm just worried about being to hard on her and all haha
Have you spoken with a trainer yet? I would greatly encourage you to do so. Tell them point blank that you are not out to waste their time, but you have a potentially dangerous situation. The longer it goes untreated the longer and more difficult the repair will be, I know this first hand. Ask them if there is anything you can work out as far as payment goes; a payment plan or maybe you could provide manuel labor around their facility. It is worth a try to get your mare and you back to where you once were.
I know how dishearting this situation is and I know how quickly it can knock down the confidence that you worked so hard to build . I'm still trying to build mine back up from a trail ride that went bad with the horse rearing on me and trying to take me into the trees. The second vertical rear with her head turn to my knee I said, I'm DONE. I have that in my mind every time I go to saddle my horse now. I really believe a good trainer who has the safety of both the horse and rider as their top priority will work with you. Good luck and safe riding.