I got my horse “Pusher” in April of this year and by May the vet was telling me “There is nothing more medically that can be done, Pusher is blind” That statement hit me in the chest as hard as I have ever felt. From the first onset of equine uveitis they spent a full month trying this drop, this ointment, these shots, and these pills. I was spending 6 hours a day at the barn, at first just holding a scared 1000 pound 12 year old Tennessee Walker who just weeks before came into my life, (not by my choosing but his). He would lay his head on my shoulder not for physical support but in my heart…emotional. Over the next 4 weeks while he could not go into the sun, we walked from one end of the barn to the other learning new commands and engraining my voice into his head. The voice that has been there along side him during this heartbreaking time for me and a life changing time for him.
On his first outside journey we put him in with an ex pasture mate who he got along with. I even put bells on her so he could hear her anyplace she was in the arena. All was going great until all the horses in the stable reacted to seeing the new 2 day old filly, the noise was unreal. Pusher totally freaked out and started to trot running into the fences and barrels. I went in and he came to my voice with his call “Pusher come”. I held his halter and rubbed his neck to sooth him until the next round of whinnies started. He came off the ground and my hand slipped, he did a midair turn as he went to run his hoof connected to my midsection and I was down. After regaining some air I was able to get to a crouching position and noticed Pusher with his head down using a back and forth sweeping motion looking for me, he could have run to the other end of the arena but he didn’t. When I could speak I told him I was ok, and he came to me, as a mother horse would do, he nudged me to “help” me get up, instead knocking me back into the dirt. This continued several times until help arrived and it took 3 of them to hold him back away from me. Luckily I was only bruised, and recovered.
Since that time I have been told horses have no attachment to humans, that they don’t feel a connection like a dog would, many people have told me to put him out to pasture and worse.
I guess my question is…if he felt nothing for me why did he come looking for me? I need to hear your stories of inspiration and know retraining him is worth what I believe it is. We have started riding in the ring but now he keeps laying down while I’m on his back and the pressure from the family and friends is getting worse. Even people who have been around horses all their lives have told me “they are just a big dumb animal” I don’t believe it, I know he feels something. Please help!!