I recently (about 3 months ago) got my first horse. She's a 5 YO TB mare who had never been raced and was completely trained with groundwork and under saddle.
She was great for the first while, for about a month or so. I now credit this to her being so underweight. I don't think she was getting her food at the rescue she was at and she was not in good shape. Now, she's healthy and feeling like herself, and I don't know what to do because I don't know if herself is right for me or not...
I love my horse...but...
After about a month of being with me she is a totally different horse. She is antsy, overly-energetic, and unpredictable. She is so sweet sometimes...but when she isn't being sweet, she's REALLY bad.
I haven't ridden her in a month or more because of how afraid I am. The last times I rode her, she reared, bucked, and even fell over on herself in the barn while I was not on her, thank goodness.
She prances back and forth in the barn and paces in circles. I cannot have her in the barn with other horses because I fear for their safety. She is so high-energy and I am scared. She has reared and bucked in the barn on multiple occasions.
I just don't trust her...the only time I ever let my guard down around her she bit me twice and slammed me with her head. I had a bruise for a month.
She is not a bad horse. She's so smart, and so sweet, and so wonderful...she just has such a high energy about her that I don't know if I can handle.
I feel as though even if I do fix these issues I don't think I can be the leader she needs...I am nowhere near an expert and truly don't think I can step up and be that person that will be her leader and use her high energy level for something positive...I am too timid.
I don't think I have what she needs to reach her potential. I don't think it is going to be beneficial for either of us...except for the fact that I love her so much. I just don't know what to do. There is so much I'm considering...my show dreams, my own feelings of security with a horse...but then there is my love for her.
Do I stick with her or do I move on to an older, more been there done that horse that I can feel safe around? Or do I go off of how much I love her and try to make this work?
I'm just so discouraged...Please give advice...thank you so much in advance for your input! It is greatly appreciated...