Horse is not respecting me - Page 6 - The Horse Forum
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post #51 of 59 Old 05-18-2012, 01:34 PM
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: State of Confusion (SC)
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WesternRider, have you read the thread at the very top of the Horse Training forum? I think it's title is called "Playing the Hero. When to know when to give up...or something like that. You really should set aside some time and read it.

Please don't think I'm browbeating you. I was once in your situation when I got seriously hurt by a horse (try a week in the hospital with numerous breaks and punctured lungs) and I insisted that the horse wasn't at was my fault for not being a good enough rider. I refused to listen to people who advised me to get a different horse. I had created the problem: I would fix it. I kept attempting to fix something that was so far out of my league, that it's a wonder I didn't end up back in the hospital all over again. Reality hit when the horse pushed me down and reared over me. It's like a light switched on and I said...NOW. The horse is leaving NOW. The horse I loved so much went to a rider who could cope with him and they went on to do rodeos and parades, and his issues were addressed and resolved. The day I handed his lead over to the new person, he stomped on my foot and broke two toes. It helped my grief a LOT that I became so mad I was actually glad to see him go!! I got a confidence builder because at that point it's what I needed. When he got so boring I couldn't stand it any more, I moved up to something
more challenging. What is happening with you right now is not unusual.
Even experienced horse people sometimes bite off more than they can handle.

If you can't find a trainer willing to take on you and the horse, please, please seriously consider finding a new owner for the horse. I worry about you.

I just read your posting that went up at almost the same time I wrote this. Please know that I am not mad at you. I don't think anyone on here is mad at you. We are concerned for you and for Bert.
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I'm not a complete idiot--there are parts missing!

What you have become is the price you paid to get what you used to want.

Last edited by HagonNag; 05-18-2012 at 01:42 PM. Reason: additional paragraph
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post #52 of 59 Old 05-18-2012, 01:43 PM Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Surrey b.c
Posts: 686
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sorry im not trying to be a hero. And i truely am thinking about what everyone says but this is the first time hes had an owner who cares about him..... im not truely his owner wich makes me so sad because the people who own him never see him they never take him out for grass or even a brush... im his i guess youd say long time leaser the owners have said if i can look after him in there eyes he is mine.... in december when i got him he had manners but he also hadnt been handled in god who knows how long. it was me who taught him the disrespect because the owners never helped me never told me how he should act...if i feel that he is getting dangerous for me then yes i will have to find a new horse... i compair him and my old verrrrrrrryyyy first lease horse that my boss had leased for me. he was perfect and 17 at the time he never used to push me around.. when i think of that first horse i compair bert and i treat him the same but i know what i did wrong.. and im gunna fix it.. and im takeing in everyones advice
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post #53 of 59 Old 05-18-2012, 01:49 PM
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Oregon
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I am going to interject here. The OP is a very young adult. She loves her horse. She is not ready to give him up yet. She came here asking for advice and even if it wasn't intended, she got beat up for it because she didn't readily agree to do what everyone told her to do. It is her life and her horse. I believe she got the idea before ever coming on here that the horse could be dangerous. That is why she came here for help. Many of us would see this horse and say it was time for him to go. She isn't there in her relationship with him. Making her feel like an idiot does not help her. She is trying to find someone to work with her and the horse. She has said this repeatedly. I am sure she wishes she had never even asked any questions on the forum.

IMO, she needs to work with a professional and also learn more about horses on her own. She also needs for people to tell her what they would do in the situation and then let it go if she doesn't instantly agree with them. I know many have apologized, but at this point she has been berated so much, I don't think late apologies really count for much. I know it makes me question whether or not I will ever ask anyone for advice again.

Imagining life without a horse is like imagining life without food, water and air.
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post #54 of 59 Old 05-18-2012, 02:07 PM
Join Date: Sep 2011
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Originally Posted by WesternRider View Post
i didnt want this thread to get everyone mad at me i beat myself up everyday for letting him get away with stuff. and now i am paying for it.. at least i am blameing myself and not my horse because i know what i did wrong and i need to fix it now. as i have said im trying to find someone to help us but in the mean time i dont think i should stop correcting him.... who knows maybe if i
start correcting the little things he may get better before i find someone... when i want something i push and push and push and i fight for what i want. im sorr to all of you for me soundin like a complete idiotic young adult
No one is mad at you, and you don't sound like an idiotic young adult for asking for help or opinions, and you have no reason to apologize. Like I said, quit beating yourself up. Don't knock yourself down. All you need to do is be willing to learn, and look for resources that help you learn, and also put that learning into action.
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post #55 of 59 Old 05-18-2012, 02:23 PM Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Surrey b.c
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crap i love learning about something that i love.. when bert haqd an abscess noone told me what to do but from other barns i watched and i learnd from other owners and the horse and i knew what to do:] and he was the best for me then. i learn very fast. even before bert got all disrespectfull or whatever i watched a video and read how to make a horse bow and guess what with very little effort and takeing what he already did i have almost gotten him to bow!
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post #56 of 59 Old 05-18-2012, 02:26 PM Thread Starter
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Location: Surrey b.c
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im one of the most willing to learn person in my barn (except for one thing that i will not do to bert ill get someone else cuz i think its grosss) i tought bert to pick his foot up when i say foot i dont even have have to hold his leg and that makes me feel amazing that i can teach such a big animal ive never taught an animal something (except for my puppys)
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post #57 of 59 Old 05-18-2012, 02:29 PM
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One thing going for you, you sound extremely motivated. Another is you love learning. Be patient, and just keep at it. But keep yourself safe. Are there any training stables nearby where you could just go and simply watch? That could be good. Look up some groundmanners videos on YouTube too.
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post #58 of 59 Old 05-18-2012, 02:34 PM Thread Starter
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Location: Surrey b.c
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i work at a show/sales/everything barn but im not able to watch because i work LOL youtube is one of the reasons why i love to learn lol even tho it may not be the best place to learn but i can see and hear what the ppl are talking about and i put that into a way i know i can teach myself and bert.. i learned my show braids from pictures and very little help.... practice makes perfect? maybe
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post #59 of 59 Old 05-18-2012, 02:39 PM
Green Broke
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Indiana
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Your horse is a lovely fellow - (sidenote, you look like/remind me of my neice). It is clear you are passionate about your horse and horses in general - and that is a good thing. I am generally a fairly easy-going person, but when someone (horse or human) is in danger or being poorly treated (for clarity's sake, I am NOT saying your horse is being poorly treated, he looks very well taken care of - just offering the two primary sitautions this applies to) I am in "instant"/react mode vs. kid-glove/lead someone to the answer mode.
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