How to do the "Whose Boss" and to Bond? - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 19 Old 06-29-2012, 01:59 AM Thread Starter
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Stacie, Im moving(; There is a property for sale really close to you!

HarleyWood - Yes, loungeing is a great way, and Ill try the space thing, thank you.
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post #12 of 19 Old 06-29-2012, 08:05 PM
Green Broke
 
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whooohoooo! Will you let me try what i have to do eith poncho with ur cowboy? I wanna try to help you out so we csn go for rides
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post #13 of 19 Old 06-29-2012, 08:27 PM
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It is impossible to develop a bond without developing leadership. Horses are herd animals, and in the herd they follow their leader without questioning as they trust that the leader knows what is best for them. This is what a bond is -TRUST. Your horse will never truly trust you unless you are his unequivocal leader.

In the herd, the leder can move the other horses feet and decide where and how fast the others go. We humans show our lederhsip by doing just that -especially when yielding the horse from the ground. So when he is scared or bossy, start yelding him. It will take his mind of it, and he will realise that he is safe because you are the leader.

You become the the leader by being fair and assertive if he quiestions your leadership -ie moves into your space, acts aggressively etc, or even shies (because if he shies he is thinking for himself, rather than trusting your leadership). Meet force and agression with equal force, but be assertive not aggressive, and stay calm and unemotional. I mean that if he walks into your circle, just casually push him out (as someone else said, suggest...ask..tell..promise). When the issue is minor then suggestion is usually enough. But if he is at the promise level ie rears and tries to strike you, then you better go staight to the promise and win by any means ie get him to yield from you. In this situation you would go from promise down to suggest until he is moving as fast as you want, in the direction you want and with no attitude. When the horse thinks for himself (ie is afraid of something) ignore his antics, ride/lead (if you were already on the ground, never dismount because that would be rewarding him for questioning you!) him past it as if its not there. You are the leader and you know best. If you go "oh no pretty pony its ok" and let him sniff it etc then you are showing him that you yourself are unsure whether it is safe and want him to to be the leader and check for you. This would make him mistrust your leadership even more, and make the problem even worse.

Sorry for the long post
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post #14 of 19 Old 06-29-2012, 10:04 PM
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Just as a personal quirk, I hate hearing people talking about "bonding" with their horse. Every time they do, I think about glue....

A horse needs leadership. Some horses need a boss. It all depends on the horse. My horse was so assertive --- heads up, make me assertive ---that he almost demanded a boss! Once it is determined who is going to lead (or boss) THEN a bond might develop. Sometimes it does and sometimes it doesn't. Some people have to have a "bond" with their horse. Some are just happy the horse performs as expected.
Either way, you don't start with worrying about bonding with your horse. You start with respect and leadership. Or being the boss. Everything flows from there.

I'm not a complete idiot--there are parts missing!

What you have become is the price you paid to get what you used to want.
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post #15 of 19 Old 06-30-2012, 02:34 AM
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One of the best clinicians i have even seen was Buck Brannaman. Going to one of his clinics taught me so much!!! One of the main things he was "you have to be a parent to your horse before you can be their friend" which is super true! I highly recommend watching his move "Buck" because its truly phenomenal and i have learned so much on how to bond and become a leader with my horse and by just watching that video me and my horse and my point of view towards my horse has changed so much! Definitely give it a try!

Bandera
6 yo Hano x Canadian
Crescent Star Eventing Team
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post #16 of 19 Old 07-05-2012, 01:52 AM Thread Starter
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HagonNag- I love bonding with horses. Its one of my favorite words (: I agree with you, it does depend on the horse.

Bandera- I read his book "The Far Away Horses" awhile ago, thank you for reminding me of it, now ill go back to read it again xD
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post #17 of 19 Old 07-05-2012, 02:05 AM
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Yup. Leadership always leads to a bond, otherwise you've got a 1000 pound beast that walks on you. I gained a quicker pass into being Scotch's leader (as he had leadership issues), by using my middle index knuckle and thumb to "bite" him. After awhile, I was able to just start poking him. Hips to move over, shoulder crease to back up. I have to re-teach it, but he's still got the basic idea down.
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post #18 of 19 Old 07-05-2012, 02:22 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JazzyGirl View Post
HagonNag- I love bonding with horses. Its one of my favorite words (: I agree with you, it does depend on the horse.
The fastest way to achieve a bond with your horse is to put a lawn chair in it's stall, sit in there and sing Kum Ba Yah. An hour a day for a couple weeks should do the trick!
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post #19 of 19 Old 07-05-2012, 02:36 AM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Stoddard View Post
Yup. Leadership always leads to a bond, otherwise you've got a 1000 pound beast that walks on you. I gained a quicker pass into being Scotch's leader (as he had leadership issues), by using my middle index knuckle and thumb to "bite" him. After awhile, I was able to just start poking him. Hips to move over, shoulder crease to back up. I have to re-teach it, but he's still got the basic idea down.
Ive done that and also Ive moved him from his food and only aloud him to eat when I said it was okay. He use to be a agressive eater but I solved that problem.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Delfina View Post
The fastest way to achieve a bond with your horse is to put a lawn chair in it's stall, sit in there and sing Kum Ba Yah. An hour a day for a couple weeks should do the trick!
I sit in there feeding area and hang out with him and the other horses for hours, and ill sit in the pasture too(: I really love being out side and love being around him so I often just sit and hang out around him (;
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