How do you go about offering unsolicited advice? - Page 2
 
 

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How do you go about offering unsolicited advice?

This is a discussion on How do you go about offering unsolicited advice? within the Horse Training forums, part of the Training Horses category

     
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        10-23-2009, 04:23 PM
      #11
    Yearling
    I think you did the best you could. I think you were very polite - and manners are so very important. It was a dicey situation, and I hope he thanked you for your help! I hope is nose isn't broken!!
    I love to get advice. You never know what person has great insight into a situation and has the perfect solution to your problem. But I agree with others, delivery is everything, and it sounds like you delivered with kidd gloves.
         
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        10-23-2009, 04:45 PM
      #12
    Green Broke
    Another vote for "delivery is everything". And kevinrideshorses, I think you were right on target. Sounds like you were respectful, considerate, direct without being harsh and considering what was happening , had a lot of self control!

    I am open to advice, but also know my horses very well, so for me, timing of the advice is everything.

    An example is this past year when loading my mare T after a club ride she refused to go in. Now I know she is blind on her right side and partially blind on her left, so I slid the divider over to give her more entry room. Then I lead her to the ramp, this time stopping her and letting her acclimate to the inside of the trailer. In she went. During all this, I received many words of advice and even someone trying to go behind her and "encourage" her with a crop. Lord grant me the patience!

    So, I think your advice was timed well, and sounds like it was appreciated. He probably was thankful someone was able to take charge of this situation for him.
         
        10-23-2009, 07:54 PM
      #13
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by ~Freedom Rider~    
    If I think that something dangerous could come of what they are doing I will give them advice about another method of accomplishing a better result. I am very open to advice from people who I believe are good horsemen/women, but I hardly ever take advice from someone I know doesn't have much experience or who I believe aren't good horsemen/women. But then again I like someone elses point of view if I am stuck or am having problems.
    I'm the same way.

    I might ask advice but the bottom line is, I still have to make the decision whether or not I'll follow it. Some I do, some I don't. Mostly it's based on my instinct and whether or not I feel I can do it properly.
         
        10-23-2009, 07:55 PM
      #14
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by kiwigirl    
    I think delivery of unsolicited advice is everything. Actually how any advice is delivered is important.
    Well said. I like to say educate, don't alienate.
         
        10-23-2009, 08:10 PM
      #15
    Foal
    I think you handled it great. Saying "do you want advice?" lets him not have advice forced upon him, and gives him the option of saying no.

    One thing I'd like to point out is liability. If you tell him to change the bridle, and he does, and he gets hurt you may have to deal with legal crap. It probably won't be the guy you helped, but it may be his insurance company. They'll say "What happened?" and he'll say "Pony hurt me", and they'll ask "has anything changed?" and the guy will say "Yeah, this super nice guy was helping me with my pony and told me to change his bridle". And then the insurance company sees you as a way to recoup their losses.
         
        10-23-2009, 10:27 PM
      #16
    Trained
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Misfit    
    I think you handled it great. Saying "do you want advice?" lets him not have advice forced upon him, and gives him the option of saying no.

    One thing I'd like to point out is liability. If you tell him to change the bridle, and he does, and he gets hurt you may have to deal with legal crap. It probably won't be the guy you helped, but it may be his insurance company. They'll say "What happened?" and he'll say "Pony hurt me", and they'll ask "has anything changed?" and the guy will say "Yeah, this super nice guy was helping me with my pony and told me to change his bridle". And then the insurance company sees you as a way to recoup their losses.

    I'm pretty sure that's not the law. Even if it was they would be trying to squeeze blood from a turnip. Just because I gave him advice doesn't mean I'm liable if he takes it.
         
        10-23-2009, 11:28 PM
      #17
    Foal
    ^ That is true, but insurance companies can be a little bit bloodthirsty. Honestly, I'm Canadian so I don't even have to deal with stuff like that, but my American friends are super paranoid about stuff like this (mainly due to bad experiences where things go very wrong).
         

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