Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Southeastern PA
I am sorry that you did not get the horse that you were looking for, and my advise really centers around what do you want to do?
Your trainer is not saying he will never work, but that he will be a lot of effort. So what's your feeling about this? Do you have the spare time and effort to put into him, do you want to work through this? Or would you rather have another horse that you can love as much as this one, and just hop on and ride when you want to? Either answer is fine, I don't mean any judgement.
I realize it is hard when you have fallen in love with a horse, but that means that someone else could too, there is no reason to think that the horse would be mistreated if you chose a new buyer rather than just selling, if that makes sense.
But at the same time your trainer is saying that he needs work, not that he is unmanageable. So I imagine after a few weeks to a few months, of her working with him, if this is financially managible for you, you should be able to ride him with her lunging.
To me, it is not really about the horse it is about you, and what you think you can do and manage. And there is no judgement from me in this comment. I passed along my last horse as she was too much for me based on my current family commitments, she needed more work than I could commit to her. And I made a mistake buying her too, and I have owned a bunch of horses for a good number of years.
I am not asking you to schedule your life and post it here, or to tell us about your financial status, as I would not do that, just have a think on it and what you want to do. If you don't think you can manage it, there is nothing wrong with that, and actually you would be kinder to the horse to let it go to someone else who cares about it. I believe an active horse mind does not do well being idle.
But hugs to you either way, I had to eat a huge bunch of pride to let my last horse go as she just did not work for my current life, 10 years ago I could have retrained her. It hurt to let her go, but I think it hurt as much to realize I made a mistake. So it is up to you to decide where you fall in this spectrum, and I am sorry, I know it is tough.