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My horse doesn't respect me or my personal space

15K views 13 replies 9 participants last post by  WildAtHeart 
#1 ·
I have an 8 y/o warmblood gelding. He's 17.3 and I'm only 5 feet tall so he has A LOT of size on me. I'm not scared or intimidated by him at all and I want to be the one to fix any issues with him. He doesn't respect me or my space, when he gets distracted he completely ignores me and what I'm telling him, he's very mouthy for treats and VERY food motivated. When I bridle him he lifts his head making it hard for me to get the bridle over his ears (again the size differnce makes it hard and I'm not sure if he's doing it on purpose) He has started improving with bridling now that I'm using a bitless bridle though. When I try to mount him he moves and won't stand still unless I get someone to hold him for me. When I lunge him he does okay but if I ask for a canter he will lower his head and give a little buck. He is responsive to my voice (if I use a loud, stern, confident voice he will take notice of me but I don't want to always be yelling at him). He does know me and that I'm his momma and he works better for me than anyone else who works with him but there is no respect. So my main questions are :
1) How do I get him to respect me?
2) How do I get him to focus on me and not what is going on around him?
3) How do I get him to stand when I mount?
4) How do I get him to be less dependant on food?

SIDE NOTE: I really love the idea of liberty training and natural horsemanship and am very open to new ways of working with horses. I don't use spurs but I do use a crop when I need to (if he misbehaves when I'm riding and I use a crop it just pisses him off and he will act up even worse but on the ground he listens to it)

Please give me any advice and tips you can ! Thanks :):) !
 
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#12 ·
Horses that get distracted in new places - YouTube

I like this one. I like Warwich Schiller a lot. check out his videos.
LOVE Warwick and I'm not one to jump on the "guru" trainer bandwagon. What he does makes perfect sense in a short period of time. The others can't compare to what he does.....they just want you to nag your horse into compliance after a number of years, and then buy their stuff.
 
#4 ·
Please take a picture. I am 5/4" and I own a 16'3hh KMH. I would LOVE to see a 5' tall owner of a nearly 18hh horse next to each other, for comparison. Mine is 2 inches taller (back) than me. Yours has got to be 8 inches taller than YOU!!
 
#5 ·
There are too many things to tell you to do to fix your horse step by step. Your best bet would be to get a trainer or at least an experienced person to help you in person. They can correct your mistakes on the spot, give you guidance, and teach you better than anything on the Internet.

To put it simple and get you started. First stop giving treats, especially by hand. Put them in a bowl and only give him them when he's not being pushy. Same with his feed. Next, give him clear boundaries. Do not let him get away with misbehaving. Do not let any little things slide. Do not let him in your safety bubble. You can go to him but until he respects you, do not let him come to you.
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#6 ·
The best way to gain respect is to use a long lead line, 12' or more and move him away from you. At the walk is fine but get his feet moving while yours remain anchored to the ground. Let him circle you then ask for a change of direction and go back the other way. The calmer he remains the better his thinking processes. If he wishes to stop, make him move using as little energy as possible to do so. He is not allowed to make any decisions, that's your job. Do this for at least three days in a row and you will begin to see a positive change because he's beginning to grasp what is allowed and what isn't. If he tries to look around, move him up to the trot. Asking for the canter seems to bring out his rebellion so don't ask for it. He is also learning that doing what he wants can result in more work.
 
#7 ·
Warmbloods are by nature pretty strong and can become pushy quite easily. some folks who ride dressage do not really care that the horse have good manners on the ground as long as he perform well under saddle. the don't want to in any way "stifle" his energy. Guess it's kind of up to the person in what they are willing to put up with, and feel safe with.

but you can see in that video, Warwich doesn't get all rough or loud with that big horse, and the horse starts seeing him as important enough to pay attention to.
 
#8 ·
1) How do I get him to respect me?
2) How do I get him to focus on me and not what is going on around him?
3) How do I get him to stand when I mount?
4) How do I get him to be less dependant on food?
1) Do groundwork. Make him move his feet, when, where, and how you want.

2) Pretty much the same as 1.

3) 2 philosophies here: keep putting him back where you want him and tell him to stand. What I do is if he wants to move, hes going to move a lot more than he wants. Make the right thing easy, wrong thing hard. Standing still to be mounted is easy, moving means work.

4) Quit giving treats or food when you are working with him. Don't let him graze when he is on the lead rope. He has the rest of the day that he can eat. Your time is your time.
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#9 ·
Tinyliny suggested you watch Warwich Schiller on youtube and hopefully you did?

Your main questions are :

1) How do I get him to respect me?
2) How do I get him to focus on me and not what is going on around him?
3) How do I get him to stand when I mount?
4) How do I get him to be less dependant on food? NOT SURE WHAT YOU MEAN?

I agree you need the focus, trust in addition to that you ultimately need to be recognized as the leader. Unfortunately there is no cookie cutter fix for your horse's behavior. Regardless of breed or discipline Basic horse training begins with putting a solid foundation of ground training. Using a series of exercises that parallel maneuvers in the saddle. The element of the ground training that I focus on is Ground Control because these drills are directly related to riding maneuvers. They control the head, neck, shoulder, rib cage and hind; saddled they are called Body Control. All riders and horses should know these basic exercises on the ground and should be able to repeat them in the saddle:

a. Back up and collect. Bump the lead until your horse drops his nose, collects and moves backward.
b. Walk forward taping the go button. When you move your feet or stop your horse should stop
c. Stop and stand still. During these exercises you can use verbal cues...
d. Walking around you in a circle flexed at the pole with nose tipped inwards
e. Yielding hindquarters taping a spot about 3 inches behind the stirrup
f. Yielding forequarters normally I simulate the leg yield exercise

For these exercise your horse is on a lead, normally I do them on the left side until the horse is soft and supple; then I do the same on the right side. Once the horse can do them 7 times without a mistake it is the beginning of being; focused, supple & soft. When he can do them all without refusing it is the beginning of accepting you as the leader... OH yes, I combine them all into one exercise.

The idea here is to them repeat all the exercises in the saddle.

Actually there are videos on the Ground Control and Body Control on youtube I am certain. These exercises I use whether I am putting a solid Foundation for Western or English discipline. There are a lot more that I could mention but if you can do these it should achieve most of what you are looking for!
 
#10 ·
And remember, you are not his "momma". You are his herd leader. You can love your horse but don't humanize it. Stop the treats from your hand. It's hard to do but it needs to be done.
The others give some good suggestions. If you need in person help to get respect from him, find a good trainer that you trust. I wouldn't send him away to the trainer. Find one that is there that will work with YOU and HIM. A trainer can "train" him but it doesn't transfer over. You will then need to earn his respect. I see this all the time. A trainer can start the process and get the horse going on an exercise and then have you go in and do it and they can watch you and make sure you're doing ok.
Once you have his respect, that big horse is going to love you for it.
I used to try and be "friends" with my horses. Here's a cookie, be my friend. And I then wondered why they would act like I'm just not important to them and why they didn't "trust" me on trail rides. Now I understand :) I didn't have their respect so why should they like me or trust me. I wasn't thinking like a horse back then.
Even people are like that tho. If you don't respect someone - do you really like them??
 
#11 ·
Once you have his respect, that big horse is going to love you for it.
Bingo!! I have the area in front of my barn fenced in and it's come in handy MANY times. Last Wednesday morning I found my 16'3hh KMH grazing in it bc he had gotten out of his stall. When I came to the gate and walked through the fencing (it's pipe fencing and you can do that) He walked over TO me. I told him to follow me to the other gate for turnout and he did. Then I told him to open the gate. He pushed it open and went out for turnout. No other voice commands, no whip, no chasing.
THIS is what you get for spending quality ground training time with your horse.
BTW, I don't have to chase any of my 3 horses to halter them out in the field.
Get some help. A possibly 1,750 pound WB that towers over you is gonna be difficult for you to train alone.
 
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