Hey, I'll join the club.
Just had two babies... have no core, very little fitness level in general... can't stay straight.
My poor little horse that is 6yrs old and has less than a year undersaddle doesn't know what to do with me. She wiggles this way, swerves that way... and can't relax (or maybe she feels tense in the first place which has me reacting to it... either way).
There have been days I was SO happy with how we were doing... then I get a look at photos or video of us and I want to die in humilation. *sigh* All I can do is tell her I'm sorry I'm unfit, and that I will work my hardest to fix things for her - THEN we'll be GREAT!
From about 3 months ago, could we look much more braced and tense?
From last week (too bad it's fuzzy).. she was looking at a horse eating bridge on the side of the ring... but at least it shows I'm not trying to hold her up by the mouth nearly so bad (also shows how horrendously crooked I am... poor little horse)
I figure the important thing is that I do improve, even if it's just a little bit - the only time I'm going to start bawling is when I know the errors are there and no longer work on them. (As a side note, I can't often get coaching in my area... so I do get someone to take video of me riding, and then I pick it apart, and work on the things that are weak... it's been working because this last lesson with the coach she was saying we'd come a really really long way together in just a short period of time)
Don't lose heart - instead, picture how great you two will look once you've worked out the kinks.