I understand. The horse I mentioned was not that special to me. Not to sound cold, I just didn't have him long and we didn't really click. I really liked him, especially at first, but I got frustrated with him.
So I can understand it being hard...
I could get along with that horse, too. But I didn't TRUST him... I anticipated his behavior, which caused him to give
me that behavior.
That's what I'm telling you... Can you get past your trust issues with her?
I knew it would be hard, if not impossible, for me to get past. So, I would rather Max be happy with someone else.
Have you had a trainer or another experienced person ride her? It would be interesting to see how she did with someone else. And I hope you understand I'm not saying it's your fault. I'm more or less thinking out loud.
I did have a hunter once that turned sour... He would school fine but rear up and refuse to do anything in the show ring. (We successfully showed for a couple years prior) We had others ride him, to no avail. He was checked out by many vets, but nothing was physically wrong. He just didn't enjoy his job.
Maybe your mare would like a different job? Dressage, or something with no jumping (if she is good on the flat). I don't know. This is a tough situation, and I know its frustrating.
I'm going to try to explain this so it sort of makes sense.
With Coco when we first start jumping in the lesson, I anticipate her actions and ride her accordingly (i.e wait for the jump, keep my leg on, don't throw my hands away) and she's good so I start to loose focus because I think things are fine and dandy for once and that's when she stops. I'm pretty sure it's me that has cause this, because the people who used to own her showed her and never seemed to have a problem...
One thing I do remember is she stopped with me when I tried her, but my old trainer who knew the owners and Coco (my old trainer showed Coco for the people) for said it never happened before....
The trainer at the school barn is going to get one of the seniors or one of the juniors to ride her some time this week.
Oh, and who is Smokey? If it turns out you and Coco don't jump anymore, but you keep her, maybe you could do jumping with another horse? Personally, I didn't have the space or money to just keep Max and get another horse. But if you have the means, you could give Coco another job and use another horse for jumping. Or if you are ok with not jumping, you two could just start new with something different.
Smokey is a Connemara pony that we got for my little brother and sister but my little brother no longer rides and my little sister has another pony. He a little bit pokey and I don't really like to ride him (though I haven't ridden him in ages). The thing is if I end up having to bring Smokey to school, I wouldn't be able to keep Coco cause there is no one to ride her back home and I can only have and afford one horse at school.
Also at school I can't not do jumping, because their program is a jumping program...
I think dressage is amazing and really helps with jumping and really all riding, but perhaps working on the flat with more of an emphasis on working toward jumping (2 pt, etc.)
I also agree with ImagineThat, perhaps she doesn't enjoy jumping and it would be best for both of you to find something that you can have fun together at, especially since Coco means so much to you.
I agree with you guys, too, but it's really hard for me to face the possibility that jumping isn't going to work out for Coco and I, because jumping is what I love and I haven't been able to do it in so long.
I know I sound like I'm being stubborn, which I kind of am, but it's just hard on me.
I have been talking with my parents while I have been home this weekend and we're going to try and work things out, but if they don't get better we will have to consider other options for Coco and she will probably have to be sold.