Join Date: May 2007
Location: Fairbanks, Alaska
I think that sometimes people just have that fear. It is very hard to advise about how to get rid of it because it is really an internal battle.
I would say that if your passion for horses does not outweigh your fear - finding a new hobby might be a wonderful relief. If your passion does outweigh your fear, keep working at it.
I think you should be careful about approaching riding a horse in a fearful manner, as they can sense that, and tney may become more tense and nervous also as a result.
I would suggest that you work to get a smaller (14.2-15hh), bombproof horse of your own (lease or buy), that you can ride on a regular basis. It takes time to build trust. If you are riding multiple horses, of course you are not going to trust them, because you have no strong history with that horse. I think it is healthy not to trust a new horse fully because you do not know them or what they will do. As you build a bond with a horse that becomes your horse, you will gain that trust, and lose that fear. You REALLY need a safe, trustworthy horse to do that on though. I think before you worry about showing or anything, you should work on getting that kind of a bond with a horse to help you overcome your fear. It will make you a better and stronger rider in the long run for shows and such (even if that trusted horse is not the one you end up showing with).
Good luck :)