"Playing the Hero" -- when to 'stick with it' & when to realize it's time to move on. - Page 10
 
 

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"Playing the Hero" -- when to 'stick with it' & when to realize it's time to move on.

This is a discussion on "Playing the Hero" -- when to 'stick with it' & when to realize it's time to move on. within the Horse Training forums, part of the Training Horses category

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        05-25-2011, 09:19 AM
      #91
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by MacabreMikolaj    
    ^

    And agreed with whoever mentioned the insanity behind teenage kids professing undying love to a horse that tries to maim them daily. You need to learn **** fast that your horse doesn't know what "love" is and nickering for you at the fence does not mean he's going to think twice about piling you into a wall and going after you with his teeth if he doesn't feel like being ridden. Get rid of him and get something worth your time and effort - quit foolin' yourself into thinking a horse that delibrately tries to hurt humans is worth saving.
    100% truth. I worked on a young girl for ages to sell her insane horse before it killed her. She tried really hard but the horse was way beyond her. She did finally sell the horse and now owns a nice sane horse that she enjoys riding.
    When I was younger I had a friend who owned an old quiet broke do everything appy mare. The mare passed away and mom decided the girl needed a nice 2yr old Morgan show filly..... guess who's not riding horses anymore.

    Like I tell people... you don't get along with every person you meet... why insist that every horse you meet is going to be your best friend.

    Some horses you bond with... like me and my arab mare. Some you tolerate and they tolerate you... like one of my appy mares. And for some the feeling is mutual ... and those ones you sell. Doesn't make them bad horses... just not right for you.
         
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        05-25-2011, 03:45 PM
      #92
    Started
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Crossover    
    100% truth. I worked on a young girl for ages to sell her insane horse before it killed her. She tried really hard but the horse was way beyond her. She did finally sell the horse and now owns a nice sane horse that she enjoys riding.
    When I was younger I had a friend who owned an old quiet broke do everything appy mare. The mare passed away and mom decided the girl needed a nice 2yr old Morgan show filly..... guess who's not riding horses anymore.

    Like I tell people... you don't get along with every person you meet... why insist that every horse you meet is going to be your best friend.

    Some horses you bond with... like me and my arab mare. Some you tolerate and they tolerate you... like one of my appy mares. And for some the feeling is mutual ... and those ones you sell. Doesn't make them bad horses... just not right for you.
    Agreed ^ me and my Arab also have a great bond, but not so much with my Appy... Same thing as you xD
         
        05-25-2011, 05:28 PM
      #93
    Foal
    FANTASTIC POSTS!!!

    I got my first horse last December and was not able to work him over the winter as no place to ride (5 feet snow on ground). He was a rescue and great when I tried him before getting him. He has since thrown me once when he threw out his shoulder, began backing up really fast, and started spinning after that. He did not do this as a result of a spook since he is only scared of cows and very curious about EVERYTHING else. He is an Arab/Quarter mix.
    So, since being tossed (not injured) I have also had to emergency dismount when he bolted after doing his jig.

    OK--- now the up side to my horse
    He does NOT
    Buck, rear, bite, kick
    He IS
    Great on cross ties, with dentist, farrier, vet, on ground and has even touched noses with a cow, good with dogs and cat, generally easy to catch

    So, that said, I have really lost my confidence, so this is what I am doing.
    I have started taking lessons on a very sane horse with a trainer who comes highly recommended. I will be moving him to her barn and she will start working with him and continue with me in lessons (on the sane horse). I will be attending the training that she is giving him. They have an indoor arena, outdoor riding area and round pen there.

    The trainer I am working with thinks there is hope and potential with him. Everyone who has had real horse experience says he is very smart (probably too much). The foster mom said he did not misbehave at her barn and they had him quite a while as he was injured (by a pot belly pig).

    I have decided to give him a year and throw all sorts of $$$ at him that I don't really have, but.....

    Am I doing the right things?

    Bee
         
        05-25-2011, 07:03 PM
      #94
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by bee222    
    FANTASTIC POSTS!!!

    So, that said, I have really lost my confidence, so this is what I am doing.
    I have started taking lessons on a very sane horse with a trainer who comes highly recommended. I will be moving him to her barn and she will start working with him and continue with me in lessons (on the sane horse). I will be attending the training that she is giving him. They have an indoor arena, outdoor riding area and round pen there.

    The trainer I am working with thinks there is hope and potential with him. Everyone who has had real horse experience says he is very smart (probably too much). The foster mom said he did not misbehave at her barn and they had him quite a while as he was injured (by a pot belly pig).

    I have decided to give him a year and throw all sorts of $$$ at him that I don't really have, but.....

    Am I doing the right things?

    Bee
    There is very few horses who don't have hope and potential. The question is does this horse and you have a future together. Foster mom may of not had any problems because she may not have asked him to do anything.
    Other then these two incidences do you feel you have a true bond with your horse? Do you look forward to seeing him, for his sake, not just because he's your horse. The best question I feel you could ask yourself.... am I willing to keep this horse for the rest of his life even though I can't ride him. This is not to say you won't but if it were to come to that. If you find you can part with him with minimal sadness I say find him a good home. As I said in a previous post, he's not a bad horse, he just may not be the horse for you.

    As you've lost confidence riding this horse and refer to the one your taking lessons on as a sane horse... I'd have to lean towards you already working yourself up to letting go. If you just need reassurance that your not a bad person... here you go... your not a bad person for giving up a horse that you don't feel comfortable with riding.
         
        05-26-2011, 08:45 PM
      #95
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by MacabreMikolaj    
    And agreed with whoever mentioned the insanity behind teenage kids professing undying love to a horse that tries to maim them daily. You need to learn **** fast that your horse doesn't know what "love" is and nickering for you at the fence does not mean he's going to think twice about piling you into a wall and going after you with his teeth if he doesn't feel like being ridden. Get rid of him and get something worth your time and effort - quit foolin' yourself into thinking a horse that delibrately tries to hurt humans is worth saving.
    You have no idea how much I agree. It makes me die a little inside every time I see a comment on Youtube responding to really good horse videos saying: "U have such a good bond with ur horse! I <3 my pony but I could never do that! I have to always be alert in case he throws me into a fence." Makes me want to smash my head against a wall. A "bond" has absolutely nothing to do with good horsemanship.
         
        05-29-2011, 07:55 PM
      #96
    Weanling
    Unhappy Sad, but I know it was a good thing.

    I have sold my mare. She is great on the trails, but when my house deal fell through I have had to board her. If she enjoyed the arena this would be fine, but she hated it and I couldn't force her any more. Plus she is greener then my ability. So after landing on my butt yet again after asking for a canter, I decided to sell her to a trail only home. I should say here that she would canter without bucking on the trail or on the beach. I had sent her to a reputable trainer for 30 days and she did great, never threw a buck. Then I get her back, ask her for a canter and she bucked me off again. So I know now that it is me. I have been in two car accident since Aug 2010, I just can't get bucked off anymore. So I guess I am done playing the hero, but when they gave me the deposit check, just as my three year old walked up to Rose and gave her some loves, I have to say I lost it. So I am sad, but I look forward to finding a horse who will be ok in both an arena and out on the trail. Oh to be young again.....
         
        05-29-2011, 08:13 PM
      #97
    Started
    But you will find the horse to fit you doing what you want and you will enjoy riding again.
    And as you get older,it hurts too much to get bucked off. Just not worth it.
         
        05-31-2011, 06:55 PM
      #98
    Green Broke
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by bee222    
    FANTASTIC POSTS!!!

    I got my first horse last December and was not able to work him over the winter as no place to ride (5 feet snow on ground). He was a rescue and great when I tried him before getting him. He has since thrown me once when he threw out his shoulder, began backing up really fast, and started spinning after that. He did not do this as a result of a spook since he is only scared of cows and very curious about EVERYTHING else. He is an Arab/Quarter mix.
    So, since being tossed (not injured) I have also had to emergency dismount when he bolted after doing his jig.

    OK--- now the up side to my horse
    He does NOT
    Buck, rear, bite, kick
    He IS
    Great on cross ties, with dentist, farrier, vet, on ground and has even touched noses with a cow, good with dogs and cat, generally easy to catch

    So, that said, I have really lost my confidence, so this is what I am doing.
    I have started taking lessons on a very sane horse with a trainer who comes highly recommended. I will be moving him to her barn and she will start working with him and continue with me in lessons (on the sane horse). I will be attending the training that she is giving him. They have an indoor arena, outdoor riding area and round pen there.

    The trainer I am working with thinks there is hope and potential with him. Everyone who has had real horse experience says he is very smart (probably too much). The foster mom said he did not misbehave at her barn and they had him quite a while as he was injured (by a pot belly pig).

    I have decided to give him a year and throw all sorts of $$$ at him that I don't really have, but.....

    Am I doing the right things?

    Bee

    You sound just like me and Hunter. I had totally lost my confidence and almost sold him. My trainer worked with him and then with both of us and now I am no longer afraid to ride him. I really had to force myself to do it but it paid off. Good luck to you!
         
        06-01-2011, 12:27 PM
      #99
    Foal
    I experienced this myself with my first pony, and am seeing it now again with people I know who have just bought their first horse.

    I'm one of the many people who, when buying a first pony, went to a dealer and bought the first thing I rode. She was lovely when I went to look at her, but a week after I took her home she started to show her true colours. First, she went through a bucking phase, when I eventually got through that, she began napping on hacks to the point where I just didn't bother anymore because I couldn't get her to go anywhere. She seemed to be schooling and jumping reasonably well, until I began to go out to shows and she refused every fence that was put in front of her. I tried hard with her, but anytime I thought I had overcome the problem, something happened that put us right back where we started. I got another pony on loan for a couple of months to build up my confidence and take a break from her, with the hope that when I started riding her again I could turn things around but to no avail. So a year and a half after buying, I gave in and realised it was time to get a new horse. However, the person who bought her off us ended up shipping her off to England to a sale because she had the same problems with her that I did - probably my fault, for letting her get away with it - and she couldn't sell her privately.

    And now I'm watching history repeat itself with a neighbour who had bought a pony for her two daughters, who haven't even been taking lessons for a whole year yet. They've got a five year old, and he's a fantastic pony but not for a beginner. He's got an amazing jump, I've jumped him myself and he's literally point and go. But after trotting round in circles with beginner riders for so long, he's now getting fed up and has started the usual play-up tricks; when they ask him to circle he runs off in the other direction, throws his head down as if to buck before going into canter, randomly stops and spins round when going up the side of the arena. When I get on him, I can sort him out in minutes and have him going fine but the two girls - both younger than 12 - haven't got the confidence or experience. Being so young, I'm worried he's going to get a lot of bad habits and be ruined. His jumping talent is wasted as well, because he has the potential to go far. The owners are the determined type though, and seem to be set on persevering until they get him through. If they manage, he'll be fantastic for the girls when they start jumping, but if they don't it's going to be a case of 5* pony ruined.
         
        06-07-2011, 04:06 PM
      #100
    Foal
    This was a great post! I'm new to the forum so kind of feeling my way here...A lot of the posts were great, but I'm confused about "Bump it up" ??
    Also, I saw a post about the slaughter issue...that definitely needs to be a separate thread, because I'm sure there are a lot of people needing to discuss that. (Myself included...) Does anyone know if there is a thread about this issue?
    And lastly, I must say "Thanks" to JDI, I'm a long time horsewoman, and even I needed the reminder that some horses (even when I'm attached) may need to move on. And sometimes it's not even about being in over your head. In my case, it's about the horse needing something more to do than what I'm giving him. It's hard...but for him it will be a good thing. So thanks...
         

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