I had lessons since I was 7 for 2 years then off and on later. Untill I got my first horse 4 years ago. She was a dominant,problem horse, that had many set backs. I bought her from my trainer. I took weekly lessons learning ground work, nat. Horsemanship, ect. Basicly "learning with the horse"
And really looking back on ALL that work now and what happend. My trainer just "pushed" the horse on me. I turned Gypsy down at least 4 times. I also REALLY wanted a horse and finally broke down after a couple lessons with her.My trainer never should of pushed Gypsy on me like that and should have listened to my no's. But since she wanted Gypsy out of her care...
It was at least a year until things started to work and click. After our fights on who was the lead/dominant mare. I wouldnt say I won the fight more as we came to the conclusion of working together and giving into each personality rather then fighting all about it. I accepted her and she accepted me. Thus, we became the best in our group lessons.
3 years after, I started to HATE my trainer. And re-think how I was training and being taught. I hated the fact that I had to install fear into getting my horse to accept my leadership and do what she was told. Like "move out on the circle OR you will get smacked in the shoulder!" Why!? Do I have to hit my horse like that? Yes, it worked out she went on the circle. We learned ground work,ect. But she wasnt a kicking, rearing, lunging at me kind of horse where that kind of force was needed "out of my space or im going to smack you"
Once I started looking outside the box (My trainers world) I found a lot of info on liberty training and clicker training. Once I started using those methods Gypsy and I bonded like never before! It was amazing. I mean really we didnt have a bond of friendship more of just partnership. Now she sees me as the lead mare and is willing to do what I ask of her, there is no more need for force/hitting.
I guess what my point is in working with horses. If a method isnt working toss it out,move on to the next thing..maybe that next step/method will be the one your horse needs. Like said before education,training,lessons! Its easier going through life as a student and allowing yourself to learn more and new things then letting your ego get in your way. It will only hold you back...
I most def. Agree that there is a time to get out when you can't handle a horse. I think if I would of sold gypsy and gotten an easier mount. I wouldnt of learned as much as I did and also I wouldnt of looked for that other alternative in Liberty training (which is becoming my passion in horses). If Gypsy was ever up for sale you'd know I was dead! IMO Gypsy and I kinda had that fairy tale ending, it wasnt pretty getting there but the end result is fantastic.