"Sorry for being long just my story"
Apache, you don't have to apologise for anything. It seems to me that you are telling we readers what your problem is and that can take time.
You tell us you have a problem
You tell us you've been to a certain extent mislead and let down
You tell us you are working on the problem
What is difficult for we readers is to come up with a sharp sharp series of solutions because the problems which you are experiencing are not uncommon and the solutions are not always easy to find.
I haven't seen your horse, nor met you, nor seen you with your horse.
I can't approach your horse, I can't play with him. I can't sense his problems
All in all from thousands of miles away I am pretty useless at trying to give you positive advice in a few words. But here are a few words, hopefully to be of help.
Presumably you have a training ring - if not create one , round, oblong or square. This arena becomes your horse's work room. When you take him in there he works and he expects to work.
Groom him every day, even if he is not dirty. Get him used to your touch, your smell, your voice, your little ways. Make yourself, his personal owner.
What I can say is that you seem to be doing the best you can and you haven't given up. Which is a credit to you. You are not going 'to wreck him' because you are not going to hurt him.
As a guess, I repeat, a guess. I'd suggest going back to working him in hand from the ground. Buy a thin rope training halter which works on the nose and on the poll. Read carefully the instructions as to how to use it. If you use it incorrectly it hurts so be careful with it.
Get him to walk at your shoulder on a loose rein.
When you turn right, he should turn.
When you stop he stops. When you walk on, he walks on.
You play with him every day for 20 minutes or so, at the same time, in the same place. Regular routine is important for a horse.
Then slowly but surely bring into the scenario, obstacles such as he might meet out on the trailsie logs, plastic bags - whatever. Dustbins are great, they fall over. Poles on the ground. plastic sheeting. Buckets, flags.
Walk him over them, around them, get him to knock them over with his feet.
Once he does these things at the walk, with your head by his head, then do the same things at the walk with you up in the saddle. Walk, turn, stop, start, back up. stand. Walk him into corners, then back up out of them.
He has to learn the aids - your aids (cues). If you turn your head, he goes that way.
There are to be lots of tid bits. Lots of smooth calming voice. Lots of strokes and touch. No whipping. No shouting, No coarse handlng. When he does something wrong - tell him 'No' , then make him do it again.
But he has to walk out at your command .
There can be no balking, nor rearing, nor whirling.
Quiet, patient, persistance from you at all times.
No anger,no loud voices, no tension. Ask, Insist, Demand.
Use your hands, your pointed fingers, your body - shove him over.
Watch him. Learn his responses. Learn his individual ways.
Find out what he likes - then ration it, but don't ever deny him completely. Use what he likes as a bribe.
Find his fears and then allay them, one by one.
And remember one other thing - whenever you go to your other horses, he is watching. He is wondering why you are playing with them and not him. He might well be jealous. So be careful not to show favouritism. Every now and again go to him first and ignore the other two.
Apache. I can't tell you how to work this animal, I've never seen it. I am just giving you some tips to try. I can't see what you are doing wrong - if anything. Just make sure you don't get hurt.
All I can say, is that if you can turn this animal, then you'll probably have a faithful servant for life.
He'll owe you.
And stop apologising.
PS There is another recent thread on the forum about 'bonding', read it.
Last edited by xxBarry Godden; 03-03-2011 at 10:37 AM.