Serious trust?
 
 

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Serious trust?

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    05-08-2012, 10:02 PM
  #1
Started
Question Serious trust?

So I'm 16, and I've been leasing my horse for almost four years.
I'm there every day after school, and I have been since November 2009.
She's only ever ridden by me or touched by me, unless I'm there and I say "hey _insert name_ wanna ride Alibi for a little bit?"

I don't know if she distrusts other people, or if she's just stubborn, or just not understanding their cues.
I can have her do shoulders over, disengage her hips, flex, back up, side pass, half pass, on her and on the ground.
I've never seen anyone able to do this!
She won't trot or canter for other people either, just paces around with her ears pinned and her head up.

So what is that? I feel so dumb for asking!

Also to add.. I screw with her a lot, I sit on her backwards, on her butt, ride sideways, slide off her butt (yes I know it's not safe for either of us) but I do stuff to her all the time
I put my hoodie on her head the other day, and I pulled it down over her eyes so she couldn't see at all, and I lead her around on the ground. She was slow, but willing, especially if I was talking.
I let her go around me in a circle and she bumped her nose on my arm and she made the funniest little snort and backed up. Too cute.

There was a lady at the barn and she said "she must really trust you, letting you do all that stuff to her"
But I kinda don't believe it, I think my horse just doesn't care about what's being done to her.
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    05-08-2012, 10:12 PM
  #2
Yearling
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lexiie    
So I'm 16, and I've been leasing my horse for almost four years.
I'm there every day after school, and I have been since November 2009.
She's only ever ridden by me or touched by me, unless I'm there and I say "hey _insert name_ wanna ride Alibi for a little bit?"

I don't know if she distrusts other people, or if she's just stubborn, or just not understanding their cues.
I can have her do shoulders over, disengage her hips, flex, back up, side pass, half pass, on her and on the ground.
I've never seen anyone able to do this!
She won't trot or canter for other people either, just paces around with her ears pinned and her head up.

So what is that? I feel so dumb for asking!

Also to add.. I screw with her a lot, I sit on her backwards, on her butt, ride sideways, slide off her butt (yes I know it's not safe for either of us) but I do stuff to her all the time
I put my hoodie on her head the other day, and I pulled it down over her eyes so she couldn't see at all, and I lead her around on the ground. She was slow, but willing, especially if I was talking.
I let her go around me in a circle and she bumped her nose on my arm and she made the funniest little snort and backed up. Too cute.

There was a lady at the barn and she said "she must really trust you, letting you do all that stuff to her"
But I kinda don't believe it, I think my horse just doesn't care about what's being done to her.

I do that with Curly also, not the bum sliding off I saw someone cop it one day doing that! I beleive it is a trust and respect thing, they wouldnt allow us to blindfold them etc if they didn't totally trust us to be their leader.

I don't beleive that a horse can trust you unless it also respects you and it sounds like your girl both trusts and respects you.

If she acts up when ridden by other people it may be her testing them, or them not showing her what is/isn't acceptable behaviour.
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    05-08-2012, 10:13 PM
  #3
Foal
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lexiie    

There was a lady at the barn and she said "she must really trust you, letting you do all that stuff to her"
But I kinda don't believe it, I think my horse just doesn't care about what's being done to her.
Horses usually need to trust you that you wont let anything happen to them. My horse wouldn't go near anything new when I first got him. And over time he began to trust me that I wasn't going to let anything happen to him and now he will walk on anything or let me blindfold him and lead him around. Heck the first time he ever saw a tarp I was able to put it all the way on him and he had no problem with it because he knows that I wont let anything hurt him.
     
    05-08-2012, 10:14 PM
  #4
Started
Quote:
Originally Posted by JSMidnight    
Horses usually need to trust you that you wont let anything happen to them. My horse wouldn't go near anything new when I first got him. And over time he began to trust me that I wasn't going to let anything happen to him and now he will walk on anything or let me blindfold him and lead him around. Heck the first time he ever saw a tarp I was able to put it all the way on him and he had no problem with it because he knows that I wont let anything hurt him.
That's our next project, doing tarp work! Hah
     
    05-08-2012, 10:17 PM
  #5
Weanling
I'm the only person that can safely work with my boy. He is so high strung and nervous with other people, and would loose it if anyone else did any of the things I do with him.

Trust is the most important thing in a relationship with a horse. You should be proud of having a strong relationship with your horse :)
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    05-08-2012, 10:23 PM
  #6
Started
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lins    
I'm the only person that can safely work with my boy. He is so high strung and nervous with other people, and would loose it if anyone else did any of the things I do with him.

Trust is the most important thing in a relationship with a horse. You should be proud of having a strong relationship with your horse :)
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thanks!
The only thing she still hates is puddles, but she'll walk right into a river and play with the rocks!
     
    05-08-2012, 10:36 PM
  #7
Green Broke
My mare is the same way. We have worked through A LOT but I have her right where I want her to be. For me she is an angel. Canters straight, slow, collects up nicely, slow jog, goes from any gait to any gait. Other people can't get on her and make a circle, get her go lope once around the ring or keep her from swapping her leads to name a few. When they want me to school her (as she belongs to a lesson program, I call her mine because I'm pretty much the only who can ride her) I think it comes a lot from sharing a bond. Not a magic and sparkles bond but we just get each other. She knows my cues, knows what's expected from her and knows she can trust me most of all. Like wise I know when she is frustrated, I can anticipate her every move, I'm consistent, my cues are crystal clear and I'm fair. It frustrates the hell out of people that they can't ride her but it really isn't about skill level, its about working as a true team.
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    05-09-2012, 02:07 AM
  #8
Foal
I strongly believe horses need to respect you before you can progress anywhere with them. Whether that's from communicating and learning your horses body language overtime, or taking the firm and dominant hand and demanding it. Obviously in any horse-human relationship the human must be the dominant party over the horse, but some relationships don't need as much asseritiveness as others. For example my friend has the sweetest mare ever. Period. The day I saw a bunch of loud (and rather obnoxious) 12 year old girls use her as a glorified saddle rack while my friend was teaching a lesson, I was floored with this mares endurance and generosity. This is the horse you don't need such a heavy hand with, and communicating at a slower pace (taking ur time with her) suits her just fine.

Then there's my stud.... Well ahem, lets just say you don't earn his respect, you demand it. He's a well-natured stallion and very gentlemanly, but he retains that attitude as long as he realizes his place within the relationship. The minute you let something slip in your dissection of his behavior, means a chance for him to challenge you for the dominant role. This however, is very usual stallion behavior. They all test and challenge. It comes with the job. However if you communicate with him strongly and firmly, he will react immediately and without hesitation to yield to your will. That to me is a horse that has respect for your body and handling.

Your probobaly wondering how this all relates to your situatuion, OP. Well, like my example with my Stud, horses understand when different people are handling them, be that on the ground or in the saddle. If your friends can not communicate to her in the language you have developed than they will have a very tough time with yielding your horse. I see this a lot of times in the horses im given to re-train on our training roster. These are horses that have been ridden incorrectly or have developed bad habits from being handled incorrectly. And since our communication is going to "cross-streams," there are several hard rides where I need to exert my own dominance and "ride heavily" in the saddle until the horse realizes it has no other option than to follow the cues from my body.

Therefore the issue might not breed from your horse being selective or stubborn, but simply can not understand the body language your friends are conveying. Especially if they are not aware of it.
     
    05-09-2012, 07:52 AM
  #9
Started
That makes lots of sense.
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    05-09-2012, 08:03 AM
  #10
Green Broke
Lucky horse to have someone spend that kind of time with him.

Like anything else in life, the more you put into it, the more you're going to get out of it.

Your horse likes you, because of the time you spend working with him and how you care for him.

Does he trust you?

You Bettcha.

He'll do things for you he won't do for anyone else.
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