What is the most effective way on teaching a horse patience, as in staning still, waiting, etc. She stands still in the stall for grooming, but as soon as I put her on the cross ties, she stomps, walks sideways, etc. after being there for more than five minutes. If I tie her to a fence she is fine, like if grooming or tacking up, but as soon as attention is taken off of her she starts the stomping/movin habbit. I've tried just leaving her tied, doing something, and if she moves backing her, saying no, etc. but it doesn't seem to help.
Tie her in crossties for increasing periods of time. Start at half an hour then increase it 10-15 minutes per week until she is standing for a couple of hours.
Cross-ties will work? I've always tied regular. Can I leave one in the cross-ties while I clean stalls, water... etc? I usually take him out and tie him for an hour or so while I do my chores... cross-ties would be easier, are they just as effective?
I teach hobbling to all my horses. It teaches patience since they can't move. I hobble both the front and the back. The horse is totally restraint and I do this every day, every time I groom, every time I saddle. They are hobbled.
It is easy to teach, 10 minutes a day for 3 days and they will be wearing hobbles.
My trainer smacks the neck with the end of a leadrope when they are in the cross ties moving. She does it without even moving her body, she takes the hanging leadrope and does it so they associate the smack with the movement and not the trainer. It's not an abusive smack just an attention smack. I'm not good enough with the leadrope to do it w/out them knowing it came from me though. I usually just take a cowboy halter and tie to a tree or my trailer (which really is not a good idea - just convenient for me - a tree is better).
I like hobbles as well but not on cross ties. Your horse seems to be associating being cross ties with the anticipation of work. One method would be to take the anticipation out of the equation and start cross tying just to groom then return to his stall (or paddock). Increase the time on the ties, as Kevin mentioned, a little every few days until your horse is comfortable for an hour or more.
I, and I would not necessarily recommend this to everyone, would tie the horse to the cross ties and let him figure it out on his own. The method is similar to tying to a tree and letting them "reflect" on standing there. I would never just leave him there but be close by - I just wouldn't untie him unless he was in danger of getting hurt. It can be a radical way of teaching which is why I don't recommend it unless you are comfortable about it, but it has always worked for me.