Time, persistence, repetition; everyone is right. I would only add that you touch her ears like its no big deal. Start somewhere else, go over her ears and move on to another place, like the ears are not the destination and touching them was accidental.
My mare could not be touched on the head or ears when I got her, and couldn't be bridled. We are still working on her letting me touch her mouth. She can also pull back when tied. But now she LOVES her ears rubbed. And one thing that really helped was teaching her to lower her head. In a halter and lead, hold the lead in one hand and press on poll with other. Keep pressure on until the horse lowers head, no matter how little, then release pressure and praise! Repeat. My mare now lowers her head for me. I continue working on bridling and unbridling only when she is calm with her head down. Sometimes I have to move her feet for a few minutes before I tack her up to get her attention first, but as long as she will lower her head she is receptive.
I also use a blocker tie when I tie her up, as someone else suggested. These will allow the rope to pull out with high pressure, but if you use a long rope they dont get free and you just pull the rope back up short after they calm She rarely pulls back now when tied because she never gets free by pulling back.
I would guess that this horse is also claustrophobic, so using the blocker tie on a solid wall, tie horse to the wall. Desensitize by swinging rope, hands, bags etc around him until he relaxes then stop and praise him. When he is doing well with that, attach a second long rope. Use the rope to put pressure on one side of the horse, and release when he is still and calm. As horse tolerates more, increase the challenge by moving horse against the wall on one side and gently "squeezing" with rope on other side. This helps with many other things like trailering, tacking, sending, and confidence.
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