The Wrong Horse and Expectations
This is my first time asking a question and I have only been stalking the forums for a few days so go easy on me. :)
About five months ago I purchased a new horse. I had been away from horses for about ten years, but had taken some lessons and remembered how much I liked having my own horse. I am a pretty solid intermediate rider, though I lack confidence sometimes. When searching for a horse I had two criteria
1. The horse must not be spooky. My last horse was spooky and was just too unpredictable. Total confidence killer.
2. The horse must be safe on the ground to handle. I really wanted a horse that even my non horsey husband could hang out and groom with me.
The horse I ended up buying is a five year old Arab mare. And yes, you guessed it, she ended up being a spooky, cranky, hot mess. I tried her out numerous times with her previous owners, but she wasn't really getting worked, she was a bit underweight and the arena footing was super deep sand so I'm guessing she was just tired most of the time. She fit criterias 1 and 2, even though she was young and green. Then she got some weight on her and some muscle and voila! Mare who wants to dominate me and is a Nervous Nelly under saddle.
I brought her home and promptly put her into full time training with my dressage trainer. She has now been in full time training for almost five months. I have taken weekly lessons and sometimes twice weekly lessons. I have never come even close to falling off, but I'm not comfortable with her under saddle OR on the ground. I KNOW that the problems are with me since she is much more focused and happy with my trainer.
So, my questions are these:
1. Do I just sell her and assume I bought the wrong horse? My concern is that horses always mirror their riders, right? Which means that I'd just end up with another horse that spooks and gets cranky on the ground because it's me who's not getting it right. I know she'll improve with time and age so I do I just need to wait this out?
2. Do I look for another trainer? After five months I have not gained confidence and my horse is still prancing in the wash rack, lifting her hind legs at me and occasionally going in for a bite. Are my expectations too high?
Sorry this is such a long post. Even with this length, I'm sure I left out details that might be relevant. I appreciate everyone's feedback and advice.