9 Year Old Thoroughbred Gelding, El Paso, TX
 
 

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9 Year Old Thoroughbred Gelding, El Paso, TX

This is a discussion on 9 Year Old Thoroughbred Gelding, El Paso, TX within the Horses for Sale forums, part of the Horse Resources category
  • They call him el thoroughbred gelding

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    06-11-2014, 04:09 AM
  #1
Foal
9 Year Old Thoroughbred Gelding, El Paso, TX

For sale 9 year old ex race horse. Caspian is registered with the Jockey Club under the name "Cali Macho". Excellent bloodlines. He has been off of the track for 4 years now and used mainly as a pleasure horse. He has had 90 days professional training with a Western Pleasure trainer. He collects up nicely at a trot, lopes off on the correct lead and has a great stop. He stands nicely for the farrier and the vet. Caspian does require a confident intermediate to advanced rider mostly due to his breed. No buck, kick or bite, but he is a large, energetic horse. In recent years, with the addition of kids we have moved towards pleasure trail riding and he is just too much horse for our average rider on the trail. He is frequently used on trail rides but he is quite spooky in new/stressful situations. In an arena environment he is a nice boy and with his athleticism I believe he would make a first rate jumper/eventer/english pleasure horse and so we are looking for a home that will use him to his full potential.
On the ground he is an in your pocket puppy dog. Leads well. We are still working on tieing, but he will stand nicely to be saddled without being tied. He is typically ridden in a D ring snaffle. Call text or email. Price negotiable to good home. I will post videos shortly. I am also happy to email you tons of photos. 1000 OBO
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    06-20-2014, 11:09 AM
  #2
Green Broke
I would not use those photos, maybe change the wording differently in the add.... Keep it short and to the point. Put in a small video maybe of all three gaits both ways and from there if people are interested they will contact you.

He sounds like a lovely boy though! Best of luck!
churumbeque likes this.
     
    06-20-2014, 11:10 AM
  #3
Showing
You wanted a critique of your ad, so here it comes.

Nobody cares that he's an ex-racer. That's completely immaterial. He's a 9 y/o TB, period.

Bloodlines are also immaterial, as he's a gelding. There aren't a whole lot of breed shows for TBs, so the average rider won't care about his bloodlines.

90 days professional training how long ago? If it's been awhile and he's been unused, he may need a refresher.

Take out the parts about your family, trail riding, kids, blah, blah, blah. Nobody cares about that. When I'm looking to buy, I want to know about the horse not extra, useless information.

You don't have any idea what his actual potential might be, so leave that out. He's not suited for trails, so leave the idea about what he might be good for up to the potential buyer.

Also leave out the part about 'due to his breed'. It's not a breed thing, it's an individual horse thing whether or not he's suitable for certain things.

A real rider doesn't WANT an 'in your pocket pony'. What we want is a pleasant, easy to get along with horse. If I want a dog, I'll get one.

Leave out all the folksy talk, and post pictures instead of saying they're available by email. 99% of people looking for a riding horse are going to pass by an ad with no pictures.

You also need pictures of him being ridden, under saddle stood up properly, and unsaddled conformation shots. Pictures of him lounging around in the pasture are unprofessional and useless if you're trying to sell him as a performance animal.

If you want to actually sell the horse get rid of the folksy talk, useless information, post useful pictures, and tighten up the ad. What I want to know is his training, temperament, whether or not he has any bad habits, does he trailer easily, his correct height (do NOT guess), and any medical or physical issues that he might have, such as being a cribber, or needing shoes because he has bad feet.

Your ad is awful, which is why you haven't had anyone contact you. Plus, he's a hot, spooky horse and is suitable only for intermediate or advanced riders, which cuts down even more the potential pool of interested buyers.
     
    06-20-2014, 11:22 AM
  #4
Green Broke
I would say It is nice to know bloodlines due to the fact if the sire/dam are common with lots of decent offspring you can know what temperament is usually thrown from the sire or dam. This is something if I am looking at a horse and know it's registrar always look for ESP with TB's!

The trail riding is not useless, I always want to know why is this horse for sale? Not the right match? Needs a new job? Just sitting? Things as a buyer I like to know.

Leaving out what he he spooked by as well as what you feel he is good at and may have some decent potential IS NEEDED in the add.....If I am looking for a jumper I want to here he likes jumping or the owner thinks he would be good at jumping, its from there on the potential buyer can inquire about videos about said jumping or go and see the horse jump. If I am looking into a pleasure horse sure I will be doing trails on this mount, I need to know if he is less confidant in new places so I can be prepared and KNOW what I am getting into.

Thoroughbreds are can be more sensitive then QH then paints, he is only 9....with what sounds like not a whole lots of training but possibly a good start....meaning he is still green and more so sensitive. Don't get me wrong I agree to each horse they have their own levels of maturity and sensitivity.

I agree with the photos, keep it to minimal, both sides as a confirmation shots, both ways under saddle in a calm manner with the rider cleaned up as well as the horse.

Telling the OP that her ad is awful is not helpful.
Lets try and keep it positive to help her find a good match for her horse.
     
    06-20-2014, 11:23 AM
  #5
Trained
You asked, and YOU want to sell this horse, so I will be brutal and add to Speed Racer's excellent advice.
First, you HAVE To fix the "no tie" problem, or the buyer is going to call you back and return him. Hands DOWN. I have owned 2 OTTB's and I had to retrain them to this. They never teach them to tie at the track, instead using human horse holders.
ALL photos should be of this horse behaving the best you can under saddle. I would not use any photos to show the facial scars. Are these permanent? That's a deal killer.
I would suggest that you start talking to trainers and see if you can sell cheap to a trainer who will prepare this horse for English horse sports, HJ, Eventing, Dressage. TB's excel at these. If you do not, then you are starting the typical pass the undertrained horse along until he has no marketable skills and nobody wants him. Being sweet to a baby over the fence is NOT indicative of a gentle horse. My Vet was bitten in the face by such a horse not too long ago.
Hope this helps, not trying to bash but giving you some practical advice. =D
     
    06-20-2014, 11:55 AM
  #6
Showing
Her ad IS awful. It's not a jab at her personally. If she wants to sell the horse, she needs a professional looking and sounding ad.

I have no dog in this fight, but the OP wanted to know what was wrong with her ad and I told her.

Most people don't know TB bloodlines unless they're race people, so they're useless for the majority of folks. I have no clue who the horses are in my TB's pedigree, and the only thing that matters is if he's a good boy, which he is. Besides, an intermediate to advanced rider should know from meeting the horse whether or not he'll fit their particular discipline.

As far as TBs being more flighty as a breed, that's nothing more than a stereotype. My boy is also an exracer and a lazier, more easy going horse you won't find. That 'due to his breed' thing simply isn't useful because it's not true and needs to be left out of the ad. If I was looking for another TB, that little phrase would turn me right off about the owner.
     
    06-20-2014, 12:47 PM
  #7
Trained
Quote:
Originally Posted by Klassic Superstar    

Telling the OP that her ad is awful is not helpful.
Lets try and keep it positive to help her find a good match for her horse.
Ah but SR just didn't say "your ad is awful" and leave it at that, which would be singularly unhelpful, she did offer lots of insight into what people are looking at when they are horse shopping.

To be fair it IS an awful ad, which is why the OP is looking for help. Now if she worked for me and supplied that as a proof ad, I may go through a while coaching process, "OK, so what is good here" "what do you think people will be thinking when they read this bit" In a one to one, that is easy, as part of a whole raft of replies on an open board, well she needs to rewrite a bad ad, and come up with something that will sell the horse.

OH and ps, the OP has another thread on teh same subject, the closing words of her OP there What do you think? I am not easily offended :) I guess she doesn't need defending sounds like she is open to hearing it like it is.
     
    06-20-2014, 01:08 PM
  #8
Foal
First off. Much of this I needed to hear. Thank you. With that said, I love constructive critisism, and tough love is great, but using "extremes" (always, never, completely, nobody, etc) to add shock value to your opinions (which, lets face it, going off your other posts and your signature, is kind of what you're known for here) is a bit unnecessary. So comments are bolded below :)

You wanted a critique of your ad, so here it comes.
Yes I did. Thank you for replying :)

Nobody cares that he's an ex-racer. That's completely immaterial. He's a 9 y/o TB, period.
When I'm shopping for a horse, I care, not because racing is useful now, but because, as someone mentioned later, they're raised differently from the start. I'm happy to remove it, but personally this is history I like to know.

Bloodlines are also immaterial, as he's a gelding. There aren't a whole lot of breed shows for TBs, so the average rider won't care about his bloodlines.
You have a good point here. I'll remove this when I rewrite the ad

90 days professional training how long ago? If it's been awhile and he's been unused, he may need a refresher.
Also a good point, I'll definitely add this information

Take out the parts about your family, trail riding, kids, blah, blah, blah. Nobody cares about that. When I'm looking to buy, I want to know about the horse not extra, useless information.
Again, this is information I like to know. I want to know WHY someone is selling a horse, and I always ask, so I added it. Just a preference though.

You don't have any idea what his actual potential might be, so leave that out. He's not suited for trails, so leave the idea about what he might be good for up to the potential buyer.
Considering I've been riding for 20 years, I've owned this horse for 5, and consulted the professionals that trained him, I think I have some idea of what he might be good at. There's that extreme language again :) but yes this could probably be left out.

Also leave out the part about 'due to his breed'. It's not a breed thing, it's an individual horse thing whether or not he's suitable for certain things.
You are correct.

A real rider doesn't WANT an 'in your pocket pony'. What we want is a pleasant, easy to get along with horse. If I want a dog, I'll get one.
This one is just plain obnoxious. I'm sorry but again, suggesting that anyone that doesn't care about what YOU care about isn't a "Real Rider" is absurd. I like a friendly horse. I love my all business mare, but I like an affectionate animal as long as they're respectful. Also, you can remove the quotation marks. I never once said pony, that dramatization is all yours.

Leave out all the folksy talk, and post pictures instead of saying they're available by email. 99% of people looking for a riding horse are going to pass by an ad with no pictures.
For lack of better quesion, what the **** is "folksy talk?" And yes, I do need better pictures for sure.

You also need pictures of him being ridden, under saddle stood up properly, and unsaddled conformation shots. Pictures of him lounging around in the pasture are unprofessional and useless if you're trying to sell him as a performance animal.
Yuppers. Better pictures are a must

If you want to actually sell the horse get rid of the folksy talk, useless information, post useful pictures, and tighten up the ad. What I want to know is his training, temperament, whether or not he has any bad habits, does he trailer easily, his correct height (do NOT guess), and any medical or physical issues that he might have, such as being a cribber, or needing shoes because he has bad feet.
^ this. Good critique.

Your ad is awful, which is why you haven't had anyone contact you. Plus, he's a hot, spooky horse and is suitable only for intermediate or advanced riders, which cuts down even more the potential pool of interested buyers.
In retrospect, yes the ad is awful for sure. I will definitely rewrite it with better information and pictures. Thanks again.
     
    06-20-2014, 01:16 PM
  #9
Started
First, saying that he is an "ex-racer" is fine, because people do care. But call him an OTTB. People will ask how long he has been off the track or how long he was on the track, so as long as its brief, I see no reason to remove it. Being off the track will turn some folks away, but they'll ask you when they e-mail and inquire anyways if it isn't disclosed in the ad so that saves you both time.

I would condense your first five or so sentences to say something more along the lines of "Cali Macho AKA Caspian is a 16hh 2005 OTTB gelding. He had 90 days professional training in 2011 when he was retired from racing and he has been a trail horse since."

That took two seconds to read and gave everyone his name, height (which is not included in your ad) his age, his breed, the fact this he is off the track, his training received since off the track (and when, also not included in your ad) and his current job.

Rather than saying that he collects up nice, include a video. Let the prospective buyer decide if he is indeed nice or a project.

I disagree that just because he is a gelding.. or a Thoroughbred.. that knowing his bloodlines is somehow immaterial. I would remove "Excellent bloodlines" though. Include a link to his pedigree without any fuss. Somewhere towards the end "here is a link to view his pedigree". People who actually know Thoroughbreds may care how he is bred. Let them have that option. "Excellent bloodlines" doesn't give them that option.
And in my opinion, 90% of the Thoroughbreds pedigrees read like his so that doesn't make him overly special. (I looked him up)

Try to make it over all informative, but to the point. If you can, address any small issues that could be easily resolved. Like the tieing. Teach him to stand tied.

Try to focus on what the horse can do. In your pocket puppy dog is not worded how I personally like but it would tell me that he is likely friendly, sweet and easy to catch. All things that *I* would look for in a horse. When writing an ad I would word it as such, vrs "puppy dog".

Requires a confident intermediate rider is fine. Loose the "because of his breed"

Someone mentioned facial scars. Are those scars or is that just his markings? Either way, I wouldn't hide them from his ad as suggested.

Last - your pictures do not do him justice. You will want at least 1 good conformation photo and 1 good head shot included in your ad in addition to a couple good under saddle photos. None of the photos that you currently have up sell the horse. No one cares to see a horse in a pasture, eating. We know that he does that :)
     
    06-20-2014, 01:19 PM
  #10
Yearling
Too bad you're not closer to me, I would consider buying him as a project! I think you've gotten some good points made from the people who have already commented so I won't really add much as far as the ad goes. But I personally like to know why someone is selling a horse, so I would say keep that part, but shorten. Just say that you and your family's focus is on trails and at that he is better suited for say a hunter or jumper, or even eventer. I would honestly advertise him as a project horse since he has problems with tying/spookiness/and being a hot horse. While this will cut down on people who will respond, it will make sure he goes to the right home and not to someone who will be over horsed for him. I show rated hunters and I would personally take this horse on as a project horse, as would a lot of riders I know. So there is a market for horses like him.
     

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