I think your best bet would to be to find a mini a farm or private owner is selling. You're going to need a really calm, maybe even older mini to help you regain confidence. If you buy a mini at an auction, and it turns out to be sick, it will cause even more heartbreak and end up costing more money than just buying one from a farm/owner. Even though mini's are small, they can have vices like kicking and biting that can ruin your experience with them and further push you away from horses.
:) good luck, and I hope you can overcome your fear!
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