I am really, like really down here at the moment, and looking at my horses wondering if I have the right ones.....I know we have visited this before, but I am now more ready in my own mind to make some changes, maybe.
Big Ben, is well up to my weight, basically placid, but likely to take extreme reactions to some things. He is a 10 year old baby, green as green as grass, I have to work the whole time I ride him, it is fun for a lesson, or when I feel like holding it together, but you can't just jump on and chill out you know.
Emmy, border line on weight carrying, has been well broke, very hot and reactive. Hasn't been ridden off of a perfectly groomed surface very often, she isn't relaxing to ride, but she knows her stuff, so it's different to riding Ben.
Wills, is just awesome, but I need to lose a bunch of weight to really enjoy her, which I'm now actually working on, instead of talking about.
If we were physically a match, I think Willow has it all, but she is never going to be a weight carrier, and I am never going to be a skinny minny, it just wont work long term, I can be a lot lighter than I currently am, but I can't make promises to myself that I will be able to work miracles, and especially not this summer.
I also have Cody, who is quiet and calm, but is currently out of action, and maybe not the best match physically either. He always was a project, the other three I am emotionally invested in, to various degrees, Cody, not so much.
Cookie break if you have made it this far.
What has really got me is that I got on a strange horse a couple of weeks back, and was within minutes loping around an arena, doing hard stops, and little spins, without a tinge of worry. I liked that feeling, I loved the reining manoeuvres, but more than that I just really enjoyed feeling confident and competent again.
So can I find that with any of my horses I wonder, or should I give up on someone and look at something like this guy?
What do you think of him? AGHHH all this has been brought to a head be a small melt down last night.
Thanks for reading.....
Here have a cupcake