Another Fart Joke-Don't Fart In Bed - The Horse Forum
 
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post #1 of 7 Old 01-16-2009, 02:44 PM Thread Starter
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Another Fart Joke-Don't Fart In Bed

Well, I keep getting these fart jokes from a friend of mine and this one is too funny not to share. If you have a stomach problem or a bad gag reflex don't read it!

Don't Fart in Bed


If this story doesn't make you cry for laughing so hard, let me know and I'll pray for you.

This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years.

The only friction in their marriage was the husband's habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke.

The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.

Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one dayhe would blow his guts out.

The years went by and he continued to blast them out!

Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to her.

She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound
asleep and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic
waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.

Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom.

The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty
good.

About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter.

He said, 'Honey, you were right!' 'All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you.'

'What do you mean?' asked his wife.......

'Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened. But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and two fingers, I think I got most of them back in.'

Someone stole my %&#*@&% Carrot!
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post #2 of 7 Old 01-16-2009, 10:36 PM
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OK, you made me cry!

Are you absolutely sure you wanna mess with my carrots?
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post #3 of 7 Old 01-17-2009, 10:06 PM
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Hahahahahaahaha!
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post #4 of 7 Old 01-21-2009, 04:24 PM
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Omg..... Lol
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post #5 of 7 Old 01-21-2009, 06:01 PM
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LOL thats hilarious
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post #6 of 7 Old 01-22-2009, 12:52 AM
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thats the funniest thing i've heard i've heard in a long time. he he

Strength lies within the heart
but the strengh to trust lies between the horse and his rider!!!
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post #7 of 7 Old 01-22-2009, 10:51 AM
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that is horribe... so I wonder how it would go when she later told him??? LOL


It's not the will to win, but the will to prepare to win that makes the difference.
- Paul "Bear" Bryant (Former college football coach)
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