Yup, that's me..
I used to work the 8pm to 12am shift when the kids were small, so got used to coming into the house as quietly as possible so as not to disturb anyone.
One night I came in, reached around to switch on the light as I came in through the door, only to see a HUGE freaking great spider, I swear that he JUMPED off the wall and landed on me, and with the shock I took my hand off of the light switch, without putting the light fully on. So now here I am, a fully grown up mother of 2, alone in the dark with a spider, that is probably on me somewhere
So what do I do, well what any sane sensible grown up mother of two does in that situation, start screaming, dancing up and down and pulling my clothes off. The Doberman, who up until that point had been asleep, she had registered that mum was home, no need to worry, suddenly decides that it must be a mass break in, so she start barking at the top of her voice.
Husband wakes from a deep and settled sleep, and come charging to the top of the stairs and can't work out if the dog is attacking his half dressed screaming wife, or if she is defending me against an as yet unseen attacker..............
Took me a while to live that one down
PS the doberman ate the spider