What are yours?
Here's one of my favorites...although it may seem a bit cruel.
A guy was driving his car down a county road and it suddenly quit, so he walked to a local farm. He asked the dude at the farm if there was a horse or donkey he could ride in to the nearest town. The dude says 'sure, but this is a religious donkey. To get him to go you say "praise the Lord," and to get him to stop say "amen!"' so the guy says alright, takes the donkey and leaves. He rides for a few hours and ends up falling asleep. The guy wakes up a while later and the donkey is heading for a cliff in a few yards, so he starts saying 'amen, amen, amen!' the donkey stops, the guy breathes a sigh of relief and says 'praise the Lord!' and they both go off the cliff.