Old school vs New school Horsemanship
   

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Old school vs New school Horsemanship

This is a discussion on Old school vs New school Horsemanship within the Jokes and Funnies forums, part of the Life Beyond Horses category
  • Old horsemanship v new horsesmanship

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  • 4 Post By Shropshirerosie

 
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    11-22-2013, 08:18 AM
  #1
Started
Old school vs New school Horsemanship

I saw this today on FB, I apologise if it has already been seen. Made me chuckle

Old School Horsemanship

If horse is too fat…… feed it less

If horse is too skinny ………….. feed it more

If horse looks good………. Feed it the same


If the saddle doesn’t fit….. try a different one

If the saddle fits ……….. use it

If horse is sick……. Ring the vet

If horse is well…… leave it alone and don’t go looking for trouble

If horse is too cold …….. add a rug

If horse is too warm …….. take off a rug

If the horse is sweating and warm….. clip it

If horse isn’t sweating and doing little work….. don’t clip it

Horse needs to be shod…… shoe the horse

Horse doesn’t need to be shod….. leave it until it does need it.

Horses ears are forward ….. it suspects you have treats or it likes you

Horses ears are back and teeth bared……. It doesn’t like you, it’s a narky sod or its going to eat you.

New School Horsemanship

If horse is too fat…… either convince yourself that round is a shape and ignore all suggestions that horse is fat (he is just big boned!) or panic and try to starve horse in four weeks while spending a fortune on horse nutritionalist to help you do so.

If horse is too skinny ………….. Panic buy every weight gaining supplement on the planet. Put horse on expensive diet recommended by an internet randomer. Expect results in 2-3 weeks time.

If horse looks good………. Fret and worry every five minutes that it might not be or stay the perfect size, buy endless supplements to keep it exactly how it is.

If the saddle doesn’t fit….. pay someone a fortune to come out and tell you that you need a custom made €3000 saddle that they will provide you with so that they can then charge you for fixing it every few months too. Constantly fret about muscle wastage and ill-fitting saddles

If the saddle fits ……….. get someone to check it just in case. Pay them a fortune to come out and tell you that you need a custom made €3000 saddle that they will provide you with so that they can then charge you for fixing it every few months too. Constantly fret about muscle wastage and ill-fitting saddles

If horse is sick……. Panic, ask advice of randomers on the internet, panic again, watch horse get worse, eventually call the vet, second guess vets opinion, ask internet randomers again, eventually follow vets advice.

If horse is well…… look endlessly for things that might be wrong and spend a fortune trying to find out what they are

If horse is too cold …….. fret and worry about how many rugs the horse should be wearing, what weights they should be and who is going to take them on and off every few hours because the temperature went up or down a degree.

If horse is too warm …….. fret and worry about how many rugs the horse should be wearing, what weights they should be and who is going to take them on and off every few hours because the temperature went up or down a degree.

If the horse is sweating and warm….. over analyse for days on what type and shape of clip to give the horse because how on earth will you make sure he is not too warm or not too cold and now after clipping how on earth will you know what rugs to put on him!?

If horse isn’t sweating and doing little work….. but he will look nice clipped won’t he?

Horse needs to be shod…… what type of shoes? How often will everyone else’s horse get shod? Ask advice of randomers on the internet

Horse doesn’t need to be shod….. panic about whether it needs to be shod

Horses ears are forward ….. the horse loves you dearly and has a deep Bella and Edward twilight-esque relationship with you that is rare and wonderful
Horses ears are back and teeth bared……. Horses aura has changed color and he is trying to convey an important message…. And he might eat you
2BigReds, jackboy, piglet and 1 others like this.
     
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    11-22-2013, 01:37 PM
  #2
Green Broke
Bahaha, it's so true xD I love it
     
    11-22-2013, 01:44 PM
  #3
Green Broke
TOO FUNNY!!!
It the horse is big-boned, name him "Cartman."
     

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