Steps to Prepare Yourself For Horse Ownership
Prepare for Horse Ownership:
1. Drop a heavy steel object on your foot. Don't pick it up right away. Shout "Get off, stupid! Get off!"
2. Leap out of a moving vehicle and practice "Relaxing into the fall". Roll into a ball, and spring to your feet!
3. Learn to grab your check book out of your purse/pocket and write out a $200 check without even looking down
4. Jog long distances carrying a halter and holding out a carrot. Go ahead and tell the neighbor's what you're doing.They might as well know now.
5. Affix a pair of reins to a moving freight train and practice pulling it to a halt. And smile as if you are really having fun.
6. Hone your fibbing skills. "See hon, moving hay bales is fun!" and " I'm glad your lucky performance and multi-million dollar horse won you first place - I'm just thankful that my hard work and actual ability won me second place" .
7. Practice dialing your chiropractors number with both arms paralyzed to the shoulder, and one foot anchoring the lead rope of a frisky horse.
8. Borrow the US Army slogan; "Be all that you can be'...( but add) bitten, thrown, kicked, slimmed, trampled."
9. Lie face down in the mud in your most expensive riding clothes and repeat to yourself: "This is a learning experience, this is a learning experience ..."
10. Marry Money
I saw this on Facebook, and had to share : D
KEEP HORSES IN THE STABLE & OFF THE TABLE !!!!! ♥♥♥