Steps to Prepare Yourself For Horse Ownership

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Steps to Prepare Yourself For Horse Ownership

This is a discussion on Steps to Prepare Yourself For Horse Ownership within the Jokes and Funnies forums, part of the Life Beyond Horses category
  • How to prepare for horses funny
  • Funny how to prepare for horse ownership

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    09-30-2011, 11:53 AM
Steps to Prepare Yourself For Horse Ownership

Prepare for Horse Ownership:
1. Drop a heavy steel object on your foot. Don't pick it up right away. Shout "Get off, stupid! Get off!"
2. Leap out of a moving vehicle and practice "Relaxing into the fall". Roll into a ball, and spring to your feet!
3. Learn to grab your check book out of your purse/pocket and write out a $200 check without even looking down
4. Jog long distances carrying a halter and holding out a carrot. Go ahead and tell the neighbor's what you're doing.They might as well know now.
5. Affix a pair of reins to a moving freight train and practice pulling it to a halt. And smile as if you are really having fun.
6. Hone your fibbing skills. "See hon, moving hay bales is fun!" and " I'm glad your lucky performance and multi-million dollar horse won you first place - I'm just thankful that my hard work and actual ability won me second place" .
7. Practice dialing your chiropractors number with both arms paralyzed to the shoulder, and one foot anchoring the lead rope of a frisky horse.
8. Borrow the US Army slogan; "Be all that you can be'...( but add) bitten, thrown, kicked, slimmed, trampled."
9. Lie face down in the mud in your most expensive riding clothes and repeat to yourself: "This is a learning experience, this is a learning experience ..."
10. Marry Money

I saw this on Facebook, and had to share : D
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    09-30-2011, 11:59 AM
Hahahahaha thanks!
Ellie Bramel likes this.
    09-30-2011, 12:11 PM
Love it!!
    09-30-2011, 10:10 PM
To funny!
    11-18-2011, 12:39 AM
Haha, that's pretty good. Made me smile. :)
    11-22-2011, 12:18 AM
Lol I love this.
    11-22-2011, 12:38 AM
<3....Esp. Number 1....and possibly 10 ;)
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    12-16-2011, 01:13 PM
The first one was the funniest! Haha!
    12-25-2011, 07:51 PM
Haha I've seen this before on the "manure happens" app
    01-10-2012, 06:55 PM
This is amazing - love it love it love it! Especially the one with jogging with a carrot and hatler in your hand - too many times!!!!x

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