Originally Posted by SouthernTrails View Post
Southerners know their religions:
Bapdiss, Methdiss, Football
Having bad hair and nails, Having bad manners, Cooking food badly
Only a Southerner knows the difference between
a hissie fit and a conniption, and that you
don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is,
as in:"Going to town, be back directly."
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace
for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a
big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis,
they also know to add a large banana puddin'!
Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk."
Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it --
we do not like our tea unsweetened.
"Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.
And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little
old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway.
You just say, "Bless her sweet little heart"... and go your own way.
1. Religion: Don't forget Nascar! Football and Nascar are the 2 largest religions after Babdiss.
2. A true Southern Lady will not "make a scene" in public.
3. Hissy Fit, Conniption and the ultimate Wall Eyed Fit.
4. Peach or Blackberry Cobbler will cure anything.
5. Southern Parents will tell their children, "That's what will happen if ya don't drink yo' SWEET milk!".
6. A Southerner also knows that "Bless yo' Heart!" is a true wish for a blessing, a way to tell someone they're ******ed, and a curse all at once sometimes.
7. Dinner is eaten at noon, Supper is at 5:30 p.m.
8. Weds. night is a Holy Day of Obligation, you MUST go to church as well as on Sunday.
9. Every Southern girl knows exactly what "Ladies don't.........." means.