10. Drop a heavy steel object on your foot. Don't pick it up right away. Shout, "Get off, Get off, GET OFF!"
9. Leap out of a moving vehicle & practice "relaxing in the fall." Roll lithely into a ball and spring to your feet.
8. Learn to grab your cheque book out of your purse and write out a $200 cheque without even looking down.
7. Jog long distances carrying a halter and a carrot. Go ahead and tell the neighbours what you are doing - they might as well know now.
6. Affix a pair of reins to a moving freight train and practice pulling it to a halt. Smile as if you are having fun!
5. Hone your fibbing skills "See, hon, moving hay bales is FUN!" & "No, really, I'm glad your lucky performance and multimillion dollar horse won the blue ribbon. I am just thankful that my hard work and actual ability won me second place."
4. Practice dialling your chiropractor's number with both arms paralysed to the shoulder and one foot anchoring the lead rope of a frisky horse.
3. Borrow the US Army slogan: Be All That You Can Be - bitten, thrown, kicked, slimed, trampled, etc.
2. Lie face down in a puddle of mud in your most expensive riding clothes and repeat to yourself, "This is a learning experience, this is a learning experience, this is..."
1. The number 1 exercise to become a better equestrian - marry money!!