Twenty-nine lines to make you smile - The Horse Forum

 
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post #1 of 6 Old 11-25-2008, 11:24 PM Thread Starter
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Twenty-nine lines to make you smile

1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.
2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke. ;
5. Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.
6. You're just jealous because the voices talk only to me.
7. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
8.Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
9. I'm not a complete idiot -- some parts are missing.
10. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
11. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.
12. God must love stupid people; He made so many.
13. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
14. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
15. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
16. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it.
17. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.
18. Procrastinate Now!
19. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?
20. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
21. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
22. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!
23. They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
24. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.
25. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.
26. Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
27. The trouble with life is there's no background music.
28. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.
29. I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on.
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post #2 of 6 Old 11-26-2008, 03:38 AM
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those were great , spyder thanks for sharing.

I am concerned for the security of our great Nation; not so much because of any threat from without, but because of the insidious forces working from within. Douglas MacArthur
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post #3 of 6 Old 11-26-2008, 01:12 PM
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haha, that is funny and so true.

A good cowboy always has a better horse at the end of the ride, a poor cowboy will be afoot reguardless of the horse.

Mis Raices Estan Aqui (my roots are buried here)
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post #4 of 6 Old 11-26-2008, 03:10 PM
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very funny 2 & 5 are my favorites

-L'eggo My Eggo "Eggo" - 9 yr Belgian Draft X Quarter Horse Gelding
-Frequent Flyer "Jett"- 9yr Belgian Sporthorse
-Dusty Doc Lou "Dusty" - R.I.P
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post #5 of 6 Old 11-29-2008, 05:44 AM
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lol I like them! They're funny, and so true!! I like number 27!

In riding a horse we borrow freedom
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post #6 of 6 Old 11-29-2008, 07:03 AM
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Wow Those were so good.

"On hyviä vuosia, kauniita muistoja, mutta kuitenkaan, en saata unohtaa,
Että koskaan en ole yksin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Vaikka myrsky hetkeksi tyyntyykin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Ja pian taas uusin hönkäyksin, varjo seuraa onneain.
Hei tuu mun luo, pieneksi hetkeksi. Puhutaan, varjoni, valkoiseksi enkeliksi."

Pelle Miljoona Oy - Varjo seuraa onneain

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