So one of the school horses I ride used to be an eventer, and therefore she loves to quickly fly over those jumps. When going towards the first jump it's alright. I am able with my seat at the trot to get her at a pace that is both comfortable for me and has more than enough impulse, but when approaching the second jump at a canter I have more trouble. I feel that while she isn't necessarily rushing, she does go a bit too fast for my liking. I had two falls in the past while jumping with another trainer, so while my confidence has improved very much, I am a very cautious jumper.
I've only recently started jumping two jumps one after the other (instead of only one), and cantering towards a jump as well (always the second never the first), so I suppose I have not yet developed that feel that would permit me to slow her down without pulling in her mouth (which I try to really avoid because the last time I unconsciously (due to nerves) pulled on a horse's mouth he refused and I went flying like superwoman).
So basically I am asking for some tips, (or ways) to slow down a horse when you feel they are going too quickly towards a jump. Ways that won't confuse the horse and then make them refuse the jump.
Thank you very much
Edit: sorry my title says a few, but really there is only one question