I haven't had consistent jumping lessons for about 7 years, and I'm finding that my confidence is a bit depleted from when I was a kid. I never jumped very high growing up, but I think I was pretty decent and I was able to get around challenging courses. I felt like a rider, not a passenger. Now I'm starting over with simple lines (I haven't done more than a line or single jump at a time, no courses) and I find myself getting nervous as soon as the jump is higher than a little crossrail My trainer knows this and is keeping the jumps low for me and making things simple, so I feel like it's my challenge to get over my mental block now.
I guess before I knew that even if my distance wasn't perfect, the horse I was riding would help me out and things would be ok. Now, even over a 2'3" vertical I feel like I have to get the distance perfect or bad things will happen (I don't even know what I think will happen ... these horses are very sweet and logically I know they can pack me out of it if I hit a bad distance every once in a while)
So help me out mentally here. I'm not totally terrified or anything, and I'm trying really hard not to transfer any nervousness to the horses I'm riding, but what can I do to improve my confidence? Heck, I'm only trotting in and cantering out! This is not grand prix! I need to get past my mental thing and just start riding again. All suggestions are appreciated, especially from any other adult riders who feel this annoying self-preservation thing kicking in