Okay, so lately I've been getting anxious about jumps.
Let's start with a bit about my 'jumping career-'
I've been riding for 7 years, and jumping regularly for about 4 yrs, my very first jump being maybe 5 years ago, but in that year we didn't jump a whole lot.
The very highest I've ever jumped is 2'9, but I've only done that 2 or 3 times. I jump 2'6 on the school horse I ride maybe once every 3 weeks, and 2'-2'3 at least once a week.
For some reason I am chicken to jump Cowboy (My new 4-yr-old) over 18' at home. I am just terrified of the following -
- I'll hurt Cowboy
- I'll jump poorly
- Cowboy will get too strung out and hot from me jumping him too fast.
I'm really not scared of falling off - My flat has been stressed forever, and I can (and have) loose both sturrups over a jump and stay on. That doesn't scare me. What does scare me is that I'll look like crap. Seriously, I want it to look and feel perfect ... and I'm scared to get anything otherwise. I know for a fact I can jump 18' on CB, so I stay there ... I know for a fact I can jump 2'3 on the school horses ... so what's going on?
ALSO, I am scared to jump something if it has walls, flowers, or anything that makes it look higher than it really is. If it looks high, I get scared, and jump like crap. For example, at a show we went to recently, we did a Working Hunter and Hunter Hack class on the school horse. (This was a versatility show, so there were only these jump classes.) We got there early to practice all the jumps - 2'3, by the way - that we were doing for WH and HH. WH jumps had flowers, coops, walls, etc. I got terrified - they looked like 3'!! Therefore, I jumped like shat, yanked Willie in the mouth once, and overall did horrid. We scratched WH. Then I go in to do HH - same height, but no fillers under the jumps. WE WON THE CLASS!!!! So how in the world can I just get scared and do horrid?
Please help :'( I want to improve my jumping, but how when I'm terrified?
Thanks for reading the novel - a cookie for you!
I want excersizes to get over my fears, just tidbits of info, your stories... anything...