Since then, things have really come together and I have gotten to where I love riding him, and even jumping him. Today, we were working on courses and I realized I was really having fun - I wasn't just happy we did well, but I didn't want to quit and was looking for her to add fences. I was relaxed (the nerves still pop up at times during the lesson but I can manage them now - my trainer makes fun of my wild eye expressions at times), could control his stride, going from the added strides down the line one trip to the correct number of strides the next when I decided it, NOT him, doing the lead changes, and staying balanced in the corners. It has gone from everything being in fastforward vision to regular time, which has helped tremendously. And I have discovered that when I am nervous approaching a line, a little half halt combined with a large deep breath before the first fence and immediately upon landing will get me through it just fine.
Thank you guys for all your help back then. Hopefully I'll get a video at some point to show you guys.