Well, there goes my confidence.

So, I have a Warmblood X Thoroughbred named Stoney who I've owned for just over a year. We have jumped up to 3'3, but generally we jump between 2'3-2'9 and im confortable at this height. I've always been a confident rider, I've taken my share of falls, and been quite hurt because of them.
A month or so I fell off Stoney when he ducked out infront of a jump. It was completely my fault he ducked out, I didnt have him straight nor did we have enough momentum to make the jump, anyways, I ended up landing on the jump, and breaking it. Like snapping the pole in half. This hurt so bad, but I wasnt scared or anything. I didnt not get back on (we were worried I had fractured my hip) but next week I was jumping again no problem.
Anyways, I fell off last friday when Stoney stopped infront of a 2'9 oxer and well, I didnt stop. I wasnt hurt or anything, I jumped up and got back on. But then I realized how scared I was. I tried to get him to jump the jump I had fallen off of over, but I couldnt get him to go over it. So my instructor told me to jump the little 18" crossrail. He wouldnt. So I hopped off and we lunged him over both jumps, he didnt even bat an eye, he just hopped over them no problem. He wouldnt jump them because I was scared to. I've never been scared to jump in my life. And now, im scared to jump even the smallest of jumps. I want to quit jumping.
Does anyone know any tips on how I can get my confidence back?

Ps. Sorry about any spelling mistakes, I typed this all really quickly

I know what it's like to totally lose your confidence! Don't worry, it will come back with time. What I would recommend is to stick to the flat for awhile. I used to get freaked out when my horse would get excited when we jumped and then one day I fell off when he unexpectedly refused. I was terrified to jump again. So I stuck to the flat for awhile and just went back to doing simple things. It's amazing being able to do simple things extraordinarily well helps your confidence!

You can always go back to just going over ground poles and focusing more on control. Be able to walk, trot, canter and hand gallop in a safe manner over the ground poles. Trust me, one day the confidence will come back and you'll be excited to jump yet again and won't feel concerned about the height or anything at all. Just be sure to take it slowly because you don't want to damage your already fragile confidence.

I hope this was helpful! The confidence issues I had differed from yours a bit but hopefully these suggestions will help. Best of luck!

The 1st step you already done it recognize you are scared I wasin a situation like urs last yr and it took me months to openly say I was scared.
Then do flat work, and slowly with patiance like haleylvsshammy says start doing poles and suddenly you will want a small cross to jump and its done sooner than latter youll be like nothing happened.
Best of luckssss, believ me I know what it feels

Thanks guys! I have a lesson on friday, so i'll suggest to my instructor that we should work on poles. I'll let you know how it goes!

Agreed. This best way to get your confidence back is to go slow. If you are going to jump don't push yourself. Stay low. I would work on some gymnastics. You can keep this as low as you want and work on your balance which will build your confidence.

And something my trainer told me when I ride back from my horrible accident that got me so not confident
"ride breath and stop shaking, everybody falls, and it hurts to everyone, including me, pessoa, and all those big names" so go ahead and remmember lots of us got scared at least once in a life time

All I can tell you is, your horse didn't jump those crossrails because he was knew you were not comfortable jumping them. Horses are so in tune to what we really want even when we aren't sure. He was protecting you which is really cool when you think about it. Maybe take a short break from jumping. If it's in your blood, you'll get the bug again sooner than later and your horse will happily take you over them once you're ready.

You guys are the best. I think im going to to have a flat lesson, then depending on how im feeling maybe hop over a small crossrail or so. Thanks again!

I read something about a year ago in a horse magazine about a study they did. They had handlers walk their horses around an arena, and told the handlers that people would jump out with umbrellas on the third lap.

There were no umbrellas but every horse spooked - the only reason was because the handlers became nervous.

Take a step back, do easy comfortable stuff for a while and build back to it slowly.

I did an exercise with my boy today he has the rearing against one particular horse problem, and my trainer was ridding thet other particulasr horse... and I was riding my boy the minute I tought dammit here comes the otehr horse my boy is going to make a mess, yep he reared and then my trainer told me to go cantering arround and making my boy do small circles arround some buckets and it was hard for my boy so I started focusing on the buckets than when I realized the horses were working together lol.