New to this and in need of some advice
Hey Everyone, It is so great to be part of this community now. I am facing a very difficult choice and need all the help I can get.
My story in short - I rode since 12years old and it was always something I had to fight to do as the rest of my family had no interest. I had two horses in the following two years - they were both sold to lovely people and I got to keep an eye on them as they enjoyed pampered retirements.
Years passed and I became a mom and horse riding became a fond memory until faith intervened and myself and my partner leased a horse. We proved to ourselves that we could devote the time needed to be horse owners and my partner came to own the same horse. I went on the search for my ideal equine but unfortunately I wasn't able to find one within my budget. Feeling a bit frustrated and hopeless a friend of mine offered a solution... she had a horse that she was not happy with. An ex-racehorse who was not suited to her needs. This horse had always fascinated me but I was unsure of he's sharpness. She agreed to let me take him on a long trial as it suited us both. I of course being a ridiculous softly fell for this horse with he's charming personality, stunning looks and beautiful paces. It was not long before I realized that this horse had a history of back problems .... I got a chiropractor up to him and then a course of physio. I put in three months of on the ground work with the john whitaker system and watched him build up in strength, I bought expensive supplements and a saddle that would suit he's high withers. It was becoming very expensive but I was so determined to get this boy in the best form he had ever been in. Things started to go wrong as soon as I got the go to ride him again. He was incredibly frisky and I felt nervous on him , he's jumping was followed by bucking that unseated me. He was lame on the forelegs for no apparent reason and I would rest him and start all over again.
Then one day he stated to trip while I rode him. I called the physio and she said he's back was soar and tender on he's spine and blamed the saddle. I followed her advice to leave him out to grass so he could rest. After two weeks I was so depressed - for the first time I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel so I called the chiropractor. She said he's back was inflamed from he's racing days, a common problem with racehorses. It was an injury that caused him discomfort when he jumped and would need regular injections and medication and treatment and lunging. He was not going to be able to do what I wanted to do such as showjumping and hunter trialing. She also said it was only a matter of time before the injections would stop being effective. All round very bad news. I made the decision that I had to stop, the money was no longer there. The time I needed to put into him to get him somewhat comfortable was not there. Que a week of crying.
When I contacted my friend she reluctantly told me she wasn't able to keep him either as she had since bought a horse. She said she would take him back but he would be put down.
I am devastated and don't know what to do. I can't afford to keep stabling him. We have land but he is a thoroughbred and this is Ireland and there is no way I could get to him everyday to give him hard feed.
I can't see this horse put down - I think I would give up riding altogether as the guilt and pain would be too much. What should I do .... what is right by him. Any advice at all would be so appreciated.