Amba's Journal - Page 6

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Amba's Journal

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        03-12-2010, 11:59 PM
    Originally Posted by Amlalriiee    
    alright..just didn't want anyone to deal with that as long as I did, I know how much it sucks!!! If it's any comfort to you, I had to have the colonoscopy and honestly felt nothing. Other than the fact that they fill you up with air so you feel bloated/gassyish. But I just fell asleep and woke up and was like "when do I go in? Why did I fall asleep?" and they said "no, it's already over!" haha good luck! Nausea+horses=bad news.
    It's more the fact that you have to drink a bunch of crap and spend the day on the toilet emptying yourself out that bothers me. I'm pretty good with scary doctor stuff, knowing that they will knock me out. Although when I went in for getting the tube stuck down my throat I woke up towards the end, which I am pretty sure wasn't supposed to happen. It didn't freak me out or anything though. I knew what was going on so I just stayed still. I actually felt bad because I started coughing and I thought that was messing things up but I couldn't make myself stop lol. Anyway I would hate for that to happen during a colonoscopy .

    I fell off yesterday. First time since I started riding again. I'm oddly proud of it. I have no idea why. Maybe because I was kind of dreading the moment when it would happen again, but knowing it was coming. And now it's happened and I'm fine so I feel good about it...? I don't know, I'm very strange lol. It was a slow motion fall. Never had one of those before and it was pretty cool. I felt like I was floating next the horse, watching his legs moving, thinking 'I hope he doesn't step on my arm or something'. I landed on my right butt cheek. That's the only place I felt pain when I landed. But apparently I also hit my left elbow because it is scrapped. Anyway it is my right hip/butt and shoulder that hurt the most. I cancelled my lesson for tonight because I didn't want to start riding and find out I was too sore to really do much. Even though when I got back on after I fell it didn't hurt.
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        07-23-2010, 11:48 PM
    Well, I haven't been on here in a while and I feel like I have so much going on now that I just need to vent.

    Things at the barn are falling apart. My favorite horse got moved to another barn and two of the horses got put down while I was on vacation. The barn manager left. I don't know if she quit or was fired. I know she was planning on leaving mid-August, and I guess was staying around so the owner had time to find a replacement. Then I come back from vacation and she's just gone. The owner has taken over the managers responsabilities (obviously there is no one else to do them) but I have to wonder what is going to happen now. The owner has been trying to sell the barn as an up and running business (for far more than anyone is going to pay, according to some). Given that she was hoping to retire soon, now that she has to have such an active role in running things again, I wonder how long things are going to last. I like my job there. There aren't many places around here that you can work off the entire lesson amount. After almost a year there I've finally gotten the hang of things. I know my job and I'm happy with it. I really don't want to have to find a new barn but I really think it's going to come down to that soon.

    I'm still with my crappy retail mall job. Manager there is gone too. Also a case of did she quit or was she fired? Came back from vacation and she was gone (usually things don't happen when I go on vacation but after this I might never leave again). While her leaving has made things a lot easier on the rest of us, I still feel like I'm about to lose my mind. I'm supposed to be getting a promotion that will put me in charge of the stock room. It's a job I feel I can do and it will come with a raise so that's always nice. But people keep making a mess of the stock room and it's driving me nuts! I work at a shoes store and we keep all the shoes in the back so when someone wants to try one on you have to go back and find it for them. Obviously the shoes in the back are organized in a certain way, and at the end of your shift you are to put back the shoes you brought out to show people. Also when we get shipments of new shoes everyone pitches in with putting them away. It's really not that hard to figure out where things go and to put them back in the right place. Yet someone (maybe more than one person, I really don't know) in constantly putting things back in the wrong places. I've found entire sections of shoes where they don't belong. Honestly if you don't know how to put the shoes up right, don't do it! And if you are going to be lazy and not do it right one purpose, don't do it! I am tired of cleaning up other peoples messes, and it actually makes more work for me than if they had just not done anything at all.

    For the most part, my jobs are my life right now. Not much else goes on for me outside of them. Nothing else quite so drama filled anyway (except for boy drama but I try not to talk about that; it never helps anyway). I've really just been feeling like I'm about to cry these last couple of days. I feel like there's just this huge pressure on me and every little thing is going to send me over the edge. I hate this part of summer; it's always been the worst for me. At this point I just want it to be over, even though I know that means I'll have the added pressure of classes. I hoping to be leasing my friend's horse soon, but that will be just another added pressure. I'm also hoping it will help some, to offer me an escape from all of this. I would love to be able to just go ride whenever I want. My mom doesn't want me to do it. She keeps trying to come up with different ways to talk me out of it. I'm really at a point where I can't take that. I need support, not someone telling me that what I want to do is a bad idea.

    Anyways that's all the venting I can stand for now. I'm too tired to keep this up.
        08-04-2010, 02:08 AM
    So the riding instructor at my barn is leaving. Which means that the BO will have to teach all the lessons. I think she's going to tire of that quickly. She already decided to stop offering lessons on Fridays. Also, I've heard people complaining that she is not honoring their make-up lessons. I've got quiet a few I need to schedule which I'm afraid I won't be able to do now. I really wish someone would hurry up and buy the place. It could get worse with a new owner (I know thing could be so much worse than they are) but I just feel like things are slowing heading downhill. The place needs a fresh start and someone who actually still has a desire to be running a lesson barn. Plus, the longer this goes on, the more I feel like she's going to get fed up and just start selling it off bit by bit. I feel like I'm just repeating myself with this, and I probably am, but I'm just so worried about this.

    I'm going to try out my friend's horse tomorrow. My mom is still being unsupportive. There is no reason why I shouldn't do this. I can afford it and it's something I want to do. I really don't understand what her problem is. Anyway I hope things go well tomorrow and I like the horse. If not I'll start saving up for my own horse.
        08-23-2010, 01:36 AM
    School starts soon. Hopefully this will be my last year. Kind of sad really, that it will be my fifth year of college and all I'll have to show for it is a 2 year degree. Oh well. I got something out of it I guess, and that's all that matters. I keep forgetting I need to do some work on my schedule. Hopefully there's still a different bio class I can switch to because the one I'm in right now has lab hours when I'm supposed to be working at the barn. I'd rather not have to switch/drop my morning shift at the barn. The BO asked me if I would be interested in being on the adult show team and I'd need to work a few extra shifts to pay for it. And I really would love to do it. I've been wanting to give showing a try and this would be perfect. It's much more relaxed which is definitely what I need. So having to drop a shift I already have when I might need extras is not a good idea if I want to be able to do this.

    Which brings me to the fact that I am going to have no time for relaxing once September comes. Classes will have started and so will my lease on my friends horse. Add to that my 20+ hours a week at work, and working at the barn (plus maybe a few extra shifts and shows) and I don't think I will have time to breathe. I have never been this busy before in my life. In fact I kind of went from doing absolutly nothing to as busy as I could possibly be, in a very short amount of time. I'm really hoping I can make it all work, because if I take even one thing out I feel like everything will fall apart. (Well I could do without the extra shifts and showing but I still feel like there's a ton of stuff going on even without that.) So we'll see what happens. Hopefully I can handle everything.
        08-23-2010, 01:50 AM
    Im also here reading/(listening).. im catching up though im on page 2 barely so ill get there!
        08-23-2010, 06:21 PM
    Ok all Caught up!! IM rooting for yah!!!
        08-25-2010, 12:55 PM
    Hey hows riding comin along? Im starting my lessons next month super excited.. but totally lost when it comes to buys the dress attire for drassage! .. itll be my first english lesson so im hoping I don't fall off the horse!!
        08-26-2010, 01:03 AM
    It's going good, thanks for asking! I had a fantastic lesson on Monday. Let us know how the lessons go when you start, I'm sure you will do well!

    I guess there is more to write but I'm too tired at the moment so maybe tomorrow.
        08-27-2010, 12:15 AM
    My friend (who's horse I'll be leasing) told me today that her mom is having someone who is interested in buying him come out and look at him on Sunday. We're both pretty pissed about it. I mean I know there's nothing I can do about it. I haven't signed anything yet so it's not like I have any say in the matter adn I kind of get it, though I'm still upset about it. Hopefully it won't work out. I don't think it will. Just from hearing what little my friend knows about the woman, I don't think she is a good match for her horse. This woman apparently is older and just getting back into riding and looking for her first horse. Really not a good match for my friend's horse at all. I wouldn't have done well on him when I first started riding again, I know. I'm just worried it's going to be one of those things that you sometimes get with first-time horse owners. She's going to fall head over heels in love with him and decide that she just HAS to have him even though she can't handle him. Fast foward to 6 months later when she sells him for $500 because she hasn't been able to get near him the entire time she's had him. Maybe I'm being a little over dramatic. But I have been looking foward to this for a long time. We'd gone back and forth about me leasing him since the beginning of the summer and now that it's so close to actually being real (my leasing would start Sept 1st) I feel like it's slipping away again. This was going to be the one thing I was looking foward to in my crammed schedule. Even though I'm going to have to spend everyday exhausting myself with school and work I was going to get to go to the barn and ride this horse who I love riding. Ugh. I hate this. I hope the woman doesn't like him. Most people don't so lets just hope she's one of them.
        08-27-2010, 02:23 AM
    What that sux!! I hope he bites !!

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