A Dreamer's Vessel >> Kenzie && Sour - Page 6 - The Horse Forum

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post #51 of 94 Old 04-22-2013, 09:58 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Endiku View Post
Life is rather cruel to me. That is all...
Endiku what's wrong?

I may seem small, but if you mess with my horse, I will break out a level of crazy that will make your nightmares seem like a happy place.
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post #52 of 94 Old 04-22-2013, 11:38 PM Thread Starter
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Oh, just various stresses all combining and blowing up in my face today... all at once isn't a very fun way to deal with them!

I happen to have a HUGE flaw in that I don't tend to voice how I'm feeling to other people easily, so I end up just sort of holding it all in until days like today when I feel like I'm going to explode. I know, its terrible...and I really am working on it slowly, but its hard for some reason!

Everyone in your life is meant to
be in your journey, but not all of
them are meant to stay till the end.
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post #53 of 94 Old 04-22-2013, 11:58 PM
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Find a person or two to confide in... that you wouldn't feel crappy after sharing with, or they won't judge you, or they are experiencing something similar.

I'm always willing to listen if you need to just vent.

"Strength is the ability to use a muscle without tension"
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post #54 of 94 Old 04-23-2013, 09:55 AM Thread Starter
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Yeah. I just feel so aweful about venting or complaining to anyone, because honestly most of my friends are having just about as many problems as I am or worse. It seems distasteful to start telling them my problems when I'm usually they one they can rely on to listen and not judge them. It seems silly but my biggest fear is making people angry, or being a burden. I really am messed up xD

Everyone in your life is meant to
be in your journey, but not all of
them are meant to stay till the end.
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post #55 of 94 Old 04-23-2013, 12:56 PM
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I'm not sure what's causing you grief, but everyone has their own cross to bear....we know that....such is life.

It's the bad times that makes us appreciate the good times, the bitter that makes the sweet taste so good, the yen and the yang, good, versus evil. You can't have one without the other.

So what do you do about those bad days? Well, I pray and that always helps, but try to focus on the things you enjoy and put aside those things that are causing your despair. There's things you can change and things you can't. Change what you can and don't worry about the things you have no control over as you can't change them no matter what you do.

The thing you can change the easiest is you.

Like Margret Mitchell wrote in the last line of her famous novel "Gone With The Wind", one has to realize that in fact, "Tomorrow is another day" and know that it's up to you to decide whether or not to make it a good day or a bad day.

Worry will make you an old woman fast.
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For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

Last edited by gunslinger; 04-23-2013 at 01:02 PM.
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post #56 of 94 Old 04-23-2013, 06:25 PM
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Endiku we are similar in a lot of ways. I do that too. Its a bad habit because when I do explode, its everything that I should have been letting out bit by bit. I'm always here if you do need to vent.

I may seem small, but if you mess with my horse, I will break out a level of crazy that will make your nightmares seem like a happy place.
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post #57 of 94 Old 04-23-2013, 06:38 PM Thread Starter
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You're definitely right about that Gunslinger... worry does make you old fast. I feel like I've aged so much in the past few months!

The only thing is that I really can't find anything in my life right now that I can just let go of or not worry about. I've sort of become the glue that holds a lot of things together over the years and if I just quit because things have gotten tough, it will unravel and there will be no one to blame to myself. Its that way in mutiple things, namely where I volunteer and in my youth group.

I've just taken on too much, I think. I'm taking 8 1/2 credits this year, two of those credits being AP and one being dual credit- and I was elected the president of our yearbook. I'm trying to care for Sour and Kenzie while also managing our therapy program, dealing with some very difficult people, and trying to preserve my sanity. I'm trying to find a job so that I'll be able to afford college, and raising my little brother. And then I'm being pressured to take on even more things, and its hard for me to say no which sounds ridiculous, but its true! Normally I can handle things like this well enough, but theres just some days...or weeks, when it all seems to sort of reach its peak and try smothering me. My classes are getting harder and harder (organic chemistry especially...ICK) and my health has deteriorated a lot lately too with all of my GI and migraine problems, so I'm just not feeling 100% either. Its definitely stolen my joy away from me if nothing else. I've just completely exhausted myself...and its my fault for taking it all on in the first place! XD

And I know so many people have it much worse than I do, and I really should be grateful, which makes me feel horrible for feeling horrible if that makes sense! Lol

Everyone in your life is meant to
be in your journey, but not all of
them are meant to stay till the end.
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post #58 of 94 Old 04-23-2013, 07:43 PM
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Endiku,

Is there a way for you to give up some of these extra duties like president of yearbook? Honestly for the job market today that wouldn't really add to your resume and just makes things more hectic for you..

"Strength is the ability to use a muscle without tension"
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post #59 of 94 Old 04-23-2013, 08:21 PM Thread Starter
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I could except for the fact that our deadline is May 22nd and no one else is motivated. It is my name that is on our binding contract that states that if we do not meet the deadline we will be charged a $100 late fee as well :/ yet another crazy situation I've gotten myself into.

Everyone in your life is meant to
be in your journey, but not all of
them are meant to stay till the end.
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post #60 of 94 Old 04-23-2013, 08:29 PM
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Well if you need any assistance, let us know!

"Strength is the ability to use a muscle without tension"
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