You can check out my thread regarding my class to catch up a bit: I love my class =]
"Riding a horse is not a gentle hobby, to be picked up and laid down like a game of solitaire. It is a grand passion. It seizes a person whole and once it has done so, he/she will have to accept that his life will be radically changed."
Ralph Waldo Emerson has it clear...I've started a new life. My father is dating, now engaged to a wonderful woman with three wonderful children, sixteen, twelve, and fourteen. They are amazing, and pushing me to do things I want to do.
I've been struggling with school, changed my schedule, and fixed it all up. I'm going to start taking dance again--it's been since I was really young, but I really want to do it. My life is amazing with this family, I'm happy, really really happy, all the time. My mom and I are still tense, but we're getting past most things, I think.
But being in this Equine Science class, and in a class called Reel America (which is amazing! We watch movies the whole semester in a relaxed learning environment), I feel relaxed but I'm more and more drawn to riding, and really mad that I haven't been. I miss it a whole lot, and had to stop because of my school (I was taking three AP classes and it was overwhelming me so I dropped noe and dropped my PAP math to enriched), and now it's fixed.
I feel really guilty about Cathy. I totally walked out on her. I know she kind of deserved it. Sadie was never really broken, there were signs everywhere--the condition of the barn, the animals starving--Susan's stable is so beautiful, and her horses are so healthy and...yet I still feel bad, just because I miss them so much. You know if I had the chance she was trying to get rid of a horse, I miss Buddy so much, regardless of all the trouble he gave me I'd rather have trouble than have a horse like Sadie that did absolutely. nothing.
Anyways, lamentations. I really miss riding, and being in this class really makes me sure that this is..really what I want to do.